 by Riley Hart.jpg)
Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 77918 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77918 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
I have a great family, a successful career, and never struggle to find the company of a man when I want it, and I do—often. The loss of my brother years ago is the one dark spot in an otherwise perfect life. But at forty-three, my world suddenly feels emptier than it should. Something’s missing. I don’t know what it is…or how I think I’ll find it spending a summer in a small town in North Carolina.
Brian
I’ve spent my life in love with the woman who married my brother. When they passed, I raised their son, living with the guilt of my feelings. Now, at forty-eight, I’m used to being alone. Until I meet Charles.
I’ve never known someone like him—a wealthy, confident city man I shouldn’t have anything in common with. He’s determined to be friends. We play music together, spend our nights talking in ways I’ve never done. I look forward to seeing him—and to those innocent touches that make me crave more.
I don’t experience attraction the way most folks do, but as our friendship grows, I can’t deny I want him. It’s my first time with a man. Every brush of his skin against mine makes me feel things I hadn’t thought possible. I didn’t know intimacy could be like this. I could spend a lifetime kissing him, but for us to have any chance at a future, we’ll both have to face truths we’ve tried to ignore for too long.
A Lifetime Kissing You is a small-town, opposites-attract romance with first times, lots of touch, and a love of music.
This book deals with past loss of a loved one, anxiety and panic attacks. Please read the content warning at the beginning of the book for more information.
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PROLOGUE
Brian
Most people don’t plan to be forty-eight years old and alone. It wasn’t something I set out to do, but early in my life I realized that was likely how it was going to be.
I’d never been the kind of person who had a bunch of friends. Crowds made me uncomfortable. I wasn’t funny or interesting. I’d never wanted anything more than a simple life, and would rather fade into the background than be the person people paid attention to. As long as I had my guitar, I was mostly just fine.
The only other thing I’d ever wanted had been Nadine, my best and basically only real friend until the day she died. She was the only person I’d ever been in love with, and since I couldn’t share my life with her, it didn’t make much sense to share it with anyone else.
Because even before she died, she hadn’t been mine. There was a time I’d thought maybe she could love me too, but she’d fallen for my brother, married him, had his children, and with that, my fate was sealed.
And now, fourteen years after a car accident took Nadine, my brother, Phil, and their little girl, Libby, from us, here I was, sitting across from my nephew, Sutton, the two of us with our guitars in hand and talking. The very same nephew I’d raised after they passed. Sutton was a good man—more because it’s who he is than anything I did bringing him up. I enjoyed spending time with him, something we’d been doing more of lately. It was the only time the loneliness eased some.
“You know you can bring Jasper when you come over, right?” I asked, sitting on the couch across from him. Jasper was Sutton’s Nadine. They’d been best friends their whole lives, only the difference was, Sutton’s love was returned—at least, I assumed it was. I’d tried to hint it was okay if he and Jasper were together, that I recognized the heart in his voice when he spoke about him, because it was how I’d always spoken about his mama, a fact Sutton wasn’t let in on.
“Yeah, I know,” he replied.
I watched him for a moment, could see him mulling over his truth, and I wondered if he would feel comfortable sharing it with me. I wouldn’t push. That wasn’t how I worked, but I hoped he knew I was there for him. Nothing would ever change that.
It wasn’t long before Sutton added, “I’m in love with him. He’s my…boyfriend? Partner? Hell, I don’t even know what word to use. None of them seem strong enough for what he is to me. You’ve hinted before that you know, but I wanted to tell you, wanted to make sure you know I trust ya with that.”
I was honored as hell that he did, but those weren’t the words I let slip out. Half the time, I felt like something was broken inside me, like I felt too damn much, but it was always muted and not something I was good at setting free and sharing with anyone. “Yep, I figured.” I took a drag of my cigarette just to have something to do with my hand. “I ain’t like those folks who care ’bout shit like that. I’m just surprised it took the two of you as long as it did.”
A relieved breath whooshed from his lungs before Sutton chuckled. “Me too. Guess we’re stubborn like that. His parents don’t like it. His dad hasn’t spoken to him in months. His mom does, but she also doesn’t hide the fact that she’d rather he was with a woman, any woman and not me.”
I wished like hell that surprised me, wished even more that it wasn’t true. I couldn’t imagine ever wanting to take someone’s happiness away, no matter where they found it.
“Jasper’s been determined to fix things. He tries to talk to his dad, but…nothing. We’re keepin’ us a secret partly because it’s what his dad wants. I think…” Sutton’s fingers danced along the fret on his guitar, plucking a few chords. “I’m afraid that ain’t the real truth, though, and Jasper just can’t handle the thought of everyone knowin’. Then I feel guilty because he’s been doin’ a whole lot better. Ms. Dana from Iris’s found out, and Molly’s wonderin’ something. Kendra knows.”
Iris’s was a popular diner in Ryland, where we lived. Molly was Jasper’s cousin’s friend, and Kendra was a friend Sutton used to date. Part of me couldn’t get over so many people knowing, yet it wasn’t being talked about all over town.
“We’ve also been lookin’ for a place of our own to move out of the house on his folks’ property. That just makes me feel bad too. That’s his home.” Sutton had helped Jasper build that house, the two of them living there and working together, running their landscaping business.