Total pages in book: 71
Estimated words: 69945 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 350(@200wpm)___ 280(@250wpm)___ 233(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 69945 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 350(@200wpm)___ 280(@250wpm)___ 233(@300wpm)
20
DOM
My chest was so tight I couldn’t breathe. The pain in Corey’s eyes when I’d sent him away almost made me call him back, but I couldn’t do that. The more I let myself fall under his spell, the worse of a protector I’d be. I couldn’t get distracted. That would put everyone at risk, and I wasn’t going to risk anyone but myself.
Corey would be safe because Lisa was so arrogant she wouldn’t think she needed backup. I could confront her. I could kill her, and then I might be able to forgive myself. I might be able to live a little more the way Vito and Valentino wanted me to.
But it had to be me who took care of this. It was my job, not theirs, not Lucien’s, and not X’s. Lisa was my problem, and I was going to obliterate her.
Sending Corey away now was necessary. I really did have work I needed to get done.
Work that’s more important than Corey?
What was I supposed to say to him?
Acknowledge what happened.
Which time?
Both. All of it.
The more we talked about it, the worse it would be. It needed to stop. He was young and so innocent compared to me or anyone in my world.
Then let someone else babysit him.
I only used that word to make him mad. I needed him mad at me so he didn’t keep making me feel like this, like I might lose myself in him.
Lose yourself or get yourself back?
Lisa may have cut me off, but I’d distanced myself from people way before her.
Your dad made sure of that. Just because his attitude was common in families like yours doesn’t mean it’s right.
I’m fucking fifty years old. It’s too late for me to change. I’m the person I am and—
Bullshit. You’re afraid to change.
I’m not afraid of anything.
Liar.
The room spun. I folded my arms and laid my head down on them. I’d felt a migraine coming on since Vito had appeared. Now I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold it off even if I took the meds that knocked me out. As if this day wasn’t hard enough.
I shouldn’t be surprised, not when I’d been thinking about the past so much. That was my worst migraine trigger of all.
I was afraid of fucking up so many things. The most pressing being Lisa hurting Corey. I couldn’t get more tangled up with him and lose my objectivity. I needed to be at my best to keep him safe.
You want him.
I do.
You need him.
I don’t need anyone. I shoved my chair back and rose to my feet.
Lights sparkled at the edge of my vision. Damn I hated these fucking auras. I could only see directly in front of me. I grabbed my cane, knowing I would fall without it. If I could get to the elevator, I’d be fine. I could make it from there to my room before I collapsed.
I made it to the hallway, then had to lean against the wall as my nausea intensified.
Stay on your feet, I ordered myself.
“Dom?”
It was Corey.
“Are you okay?”
I wanted to say yes and send him away. He shouldn’t see me like this. But even I couldn’t fake the assault on my vision.
“No.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Migraine. Ocular migraine.”
“Fuck. A friend in law school used to get those. They sounded horrible. Can you see?”
“A little.”
“Okay, let’s get you back to your office.”
“No, upstairs.”
“I don’t think I can carry you up the stairs.”
“Elevator.”
“What?” Even through the pain, I could tell he thought I was out of my mind.
I pointed down the hall. “There’s an elevator.” With every word, my stomach lurched, but I was not going to throw up in front of him.
He took my arm and wrapped it around his shoulders as he helped me get moving.
“So warm.”
“What?” Fuck did I say that out loud?
“Nothing.”
He felt my forehead. “Do you get a fever with it?”
“No. You’re warm.”
“Oh.”
The elevator seemed ten times further away than it was, but we finally made it. He pressed the button, and the door opened.
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me there was an elevator. Did you think I needed extra steps that bad?”
His laugh made me smile, even as bad as I felt. “I wanted you to know I can climb stairs.”
“You are so fucking stubborn. It’s okay to need an elevator.”
“No weakness allowed.”
“Is that what your father taught you?”
“I’m a Marchesi. It’s how we survive.”
He huffed. “You don’t have to be strong for me.”
“I do. You’re depending on it.”
“Not right now. I can call someone—Val or Vito. They’ll come and keep watch while you rest.”
My fucking hands were shaking. What choice did I have? “I fucking hate this.”
“I know.”
“Come on.” He walked me to my room and led me to the bed. I lay down and curled on my side as I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone and began texting Lucien. I didn’t want my sons here. I didn’t want them to see me like this anymore than I wanted Corey to. He knew how weak I was, and I fucking knew it too, even though I hated it.