Total pages in book: 64
Estimated words: 60081 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60081 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
I blink, shocked. “You talked to Wren about helping you find a new job?”
“It came up in conversation,” she says, pulling her coat more firmly closed and crossing her arms over her chest. “When I realized the guy that I brought home from the bar my first night was my new boss, I was worried. But I told Wren I wasn’t interested in another job because I adore Sarah Beth and I want to be there for her. And that’s still true. I do adore her and—” She breaks off with a curse. “My phone. I forgot to get my phone.”
“I can text my mom. Ask her to swing back by and—”
“No, it’s fine,” she says, backing another step away with a shake of her head. “I’ll get it tomorrow or Monday or…whatever. I think I should go home right now. I need to think. Maybe being a couple isn’t a good idea. Maybe we should keep this all business, after all.”
“I don’t want to keep it all business,” I say, my throat tight. “I want to give this a shot. Me and you against the world.”
Her eyes begin to shine as she says in a softer voice, “But I don’t want to be against the world, Drew. My whole life, I’ve been an outcast, one of the family of weirdos my old hometown loved to judge and find lacking. For once, I want to be accepted, respected. I don’t want to be the girlfriend my boyfriend’s mom loves to hate. Or the nanny who fucked her boss and now the whole town can’t stop gossiping about it.” She swipes at her cheeks, smearing her mascara. “And the worst part is I did this to myself. Maybe people back home are right. Maybe O’Learys are losers who don’t know how to fit in with normal people.”
I take a step toward her but stop when she takes a matching step away. I want to hold her so badly my bones ache with it, but I settle for funneling all the things I feel for her into my voice as I say, “Fuck normal and fitting in. Fuck what people think. I haven’t felt this alive in years, Tatum. I’ve been going through the motions, trying to be a good dad and provider, but on the inside, I was faking it as much as I was making it. I was so lonely and so worried I’d never be able to give my daughter everything she needs. And then you showed up and suddenly life was fun again. Beautiful and hopeful again. I don’t want to lose that. I don’t want to lose you.”
Tears stream down her cheeks. “I’m so sorry, Drew, I think you’re wonderful, I just…” She shakes her head. “I need to think. I’m too mixed up. But for what it’s worth, this misfit, loser O’Leary thinks you’re a fantastic father. You love that little girl with every piece of your heart and there’s nothing more precious than that. You don’t have to fake it. You’re the real thing, through and through.”
“Tatum wait, please,” I call out as she starts down the street.
“I’ll call you. I promise,” she tosses over her shoulder. “From my home phone since I don’t have my cell.”
“At least let me give you a ride back to your place. It’s freezing out.”
She turns, walking backwards as she says, “It’s fine, my coat is warm, and I want to walk. I need to. It’s how I do my best thinking.” She flutters her fingers. “Good night. Thanks for…everything.”
I stand watching her go, feeling like my heart is being ripped from my chest and tossed onto the driveway beside my already pulverized stomach.
Right then and there, I decide this isn’t the end.
I’m going to make this right with Tatum. I’m going to show her how loved and accepted and respected she already is here in Bad Dog. And I’m going to start right fucking now.
A fire in my veins, I jump back into Barrett’s truck and zoom back toward Bubba Jump’s, hoping I’ll get there in time.
Chapter Nineteen
TATUM
By the time I get back to my place, the restaurants and bars by the lake are clearing out and my feet are frozen in my cheap pleather boots, but the walk worked its magic on my brain.
I’ve thought everything through and made my decision.
I hate to admit defeat, but there are times when you have to take a step back, survey the wreckage you managed to leave on the field in just a little under a week, and call the game for the other team.
When I get up to the apartment, I change into my pancake pajamas, cry a little because they remind me of Sarah Beth and how much I love her already, then mop up my face and sit down to make a list of all the things I’ll need to get done to get ready to move back home.