Series: Fever Falls Series by Riley Hart
Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 81426 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 407(@200wpm)___ 326(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81426 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 407(@200wpm)___ 326(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
“Oh God. I’d rather not talk about your prowess in bed.”
“Eh, I’m sure he’s not the beast you are,” Carter said, and then it was my turn to freak out, because no, I didn’t want to talk about that.
“Yeah, I’m done with this conversation. Not something I needed to know.” Mostly, I just didn’t want to talk about Jude, because Sawyer was right. I did care about him, and he was avoiding me, which wouldn’t do at all.
We did a few rehearsals for the wedding. Kenny did great, as we knew he would. Beth, Beau’s mom, had gotten ordained, and she was going to perform the ceremony, which I thought was cool.
The whole time, though, my thoughts were with Jude, and I got more and more restless. Once we finished our hundredth wedding meeting—which Ash was surprisingly anal about, determined it would go off without a hitch—I ducked out early and went straight to Jude’s condo, which was actually Linc’s condo. Short Stuff had moved in with Rush, and Jude was renting the place from him.
We were gonna figure this shit out, and we were gonna figure it out now.
My thumbs drummed on the steering wheel of my truck as I made the drive into Fever Falls proper and to Jude’s. I took the elevator, then walked down the steel-gray hallway to his apartment.
I knocked, and a few seconds later the door opened. “How did I know you would show up?” Jude asked. He wore a black tee and a pair of jeans.
“Because you know me, and you know you’re being stupid.”
Jude rolled his eyes and let me in. I went straight to the couch and plopped down on it. I’d been in this apartment a thousand times over the years, both when it belonged to Linc and now that Jude lived there. Jude and I spent a lot of time together, probably more than even our friends knew. “You’re avoiding me.”
“I watched you fuck someone while I jerked off.”
“So? It was just sex. We had a little fun, and it was hot as hell, I might add. Are we really going to let that screw things up?” My pulse thumped against my skin, in fear of that happening. Jude’s friendship meant a lot to me, and I’d never forgive myself if I lost it.
“No, we’re not. I just…” Jude ran a hand through his hair, then sat on the chair across from me. His leg was bouncing up and down, and my fingers twitched with the urge to put a hand on his thigh to help settle him, but I wasn’t sure if my touch would be a good thing or a bad thing at the moment. “I liked it…”
I released a heavy breath, but didn’t want to make a big deal out of it, so I went for light. “I’d have my feelings hurt if you didn’t. Everyone who sees me naked likes it.”
Jude shook his head, but I could see a smile teasing those lips of his. Fuck if I didn’t want to lick them, nibble them. They would be the death of me, I was pretty sure.
“I’m feeling weird about it all, trying to make sense of it. I mean, I spent my whole damn life thinking I was straight. Then one day I acknowledged I felt like shit. I was sad and lonely and missed my best friend. And every time he talked about this guy he was friends with, it felt like he was ripping my heart out.”
My body tensed, but I tried to ignore it. I knew this story. Jude and I had talked about it before. I was the only one he’d ever really talked to about Rush, but lately, it’d felt like he was grinding up my insides. I figured I was jealous, and that didn’t sit well with me.
“So I came here and still felt sort of fucked up, and oh, hey, I realized I was in love with my very male best friend. And oh, hey, again, he was in love with someone else. It fucked with my head. It was confusing as shit, but I worked it out. Talking to you and our friendship helped with that. Made me see I was in love with Rush and that was okay, but I thought it was just him, ya know? I’d never been attracted to another man before, and I thought the Rush thing was simply because I cared about him so much and we were so close. But I wanted to be in your bed that night, Cam. I wanted to be there without Melinda. Don’t you get how that can be confusing for me? How I need some time to sort things out?”
Shit. I was an asshole. I should have given him space. “Yeah, I get it. And I’m sorry. But can I just say it makes me happy you’re bi? Christ, Jude, you know I want you.” It wasn’t something I had any problem admitting. I wanted Jude. He was fucking beautiful. I wasn’t in love with him, and I still felt like I’d been put through a meat grinder when he talked about loving Rush, but I was attracted to him and wanted to sleep with him, and I didn’t think that was such a bad thing.