Total pages in book: 55
Estimated words: 53638 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 268(@200wpm)___ 215(@250wpm)___ 179(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 53638 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 268(@200wpm)___ 215(@250wpm)___ 179(@300wpm)
When I got outside, no one was around, not even the bouncers who had granted us entrance to the club hours before. I was glad to have a moment’s solitude so I could try to wrap my head around what happened. I sat on the curb and fought off a fresh batch of tears.
This is a disaster.
There was never going to be a ‘Damien and Alannah’ in the way I wanted, and he made sure of that. No, we made damn sure of that. He took my virginity, but I was the eejit who practically begged him to take it. For that, I had no one to blame but myself… and my godforsaken hormones.
Damien came into our intimacy with no illusions or lies coated in pretty words—until he got what he wanted. Beforehand, he’d said he didn’t want a relationship, he just wanted sex, and for me to feel so broken over him keeping his word was foolish.
In the back of my mind, I’d silently hoped that once we’d had sex, Damien would want to be with me. If that wasn’t the dumbest misconception that filled the heads of teenage girls across the world, then I didn’t know what was.
The pain in my chest was nothing like I had ever felt before, and I didn’t know how to deal with it. I needed Bronagh. I needed my friend. I heard a noise behind me, and I wasn’t sure why, but because I thought of Bronagh, I assumed it would be her. I wanted to look around, but a sudden case of dizziness struck me, and I had trouble remaining sitting upright. Just when I thought my head and vision was clearing, I felt a knock on the back of my head that was followed by my body falling backwards.
It didn’t hurt, and the first thing I thought of was that I was passing out because I had drunk alcohol for the first time. I figured my spike of emotions had pushed my body into stress-out mode, and my mind just switched off as a result. I was glad of it. I was glad when I found myself facing darkness because, at the current moment, darkness was a more welcoming sight than the thought of Damien Slater. I wasn’t granted that peace because before I completely shut off, his voice was that last thing that ran through my mind.
It’s not that I can’t keep you, Lana; it’s that I don’t want to.
Damien didn’t want me, but what hurt the most was that I knew deep down, I’d always want him no matter what. I’d never let him or anyone else know it, though. Damien might have hurt me, but I would never give him the opportunity to do it again.
He said he didn’t want me, and for as long as I’d live, I’d never forget it.