Total pages in book: 58
Estimated words: 55599 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 278(@200wpm)___ 222(@250wpm)___ 185(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 55599 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 278(@200wpm)___ 222(@250wpm)___ 185(@300wpm)
“It’s okay,” I whisper. “I want you to know something.” I lean down, kiss her briefly, tasting her. “I don’t want to leave you, but I have to do the right thing. That means finishing the season. When our kids are old enough to understand, I want to tell them I did that. I want to set an example for them.”
“You’re going to be an incredible example,” she says. “They’re going to look up to you, love you, and respect you because you will be an amazing father.”
“How can you say that?” I whisper.
She leans up and presses her lips against mine, letting me feel her emotion. The certainty in her kiss. The love. I can feel it all. Then she moves away just a bit, enough for us to stare into each other’s eyes. “I can see how concerned you are to be a good dad. I can see how much it means to you, and heck, you’re Logan Ice. When you put your mind to something, you get it done.”
“I’m going to do everything I can to be the best dad,” I say fiercely. “I’ll read all the books. Come to the classes.”
She bites down, and I know why. She’s not coming to Canada with me. We can’t discuss the later months of pregnancy until we have her parents’ blessing. She wants to return to our usual ways, disappearing into the now. Pretending nothing else exists. Like the balcony, the fire.
“How is this long-distance thing going to work?” she says quietly. “You know, in the meantime, while I work out how to tell Mom and Dad.”
She shudders, making a croaking noise. I know it’s going to be difficult for her. She wants to do it her way. I have to respect that.
“I’ll call you up as many times as I can before you get sick of me,” I say, smirking.
“Yeah…” She smiles. “Just… We’ll have to be careful. Eric’s room is right next to mine.” When I sigh, she says, “I’m sorry. Really. I’ll try to figure it out.”
I hold her tighter. “Don’t stress about it. That’s the last thing you need, and the baby needs too. I promise everything is going to work out.”
“How can you know that?” she whispers.
I close my eyes and let my lips rest on the top of her head. I savor her warmth, her closeness. “I just know.”
I know something else. Every day, every minute we’re apart, it will hurt. Physically tear me up, but that’s what being a father is—doing the right thing, the noble thing, even when it’s hard, especially then.
“Our kids will hear about all this one day,” I say. “The crazy way we met. They’ll laugh. Make jokes. Michel will be there too. One of our kids will be sitting on his knee. Angela will be knitting in the corner. Michel said she likes to knit.”
She squeezes tightly onto my side, shaking slightly. I think she’s crying again. I kiss the top of her head.
“I promise,” I say fiercely. “We’re going to be together. All of us. One big happy family.” My voice gets choked up. I’ve never had that. A family, but now, maybe… I think about my mom and imagine her in the scene, rocking in her chair. “Maybe I’ll even reach out to Mom. She’s almost seventy. She was never healthy.”
“It’s your choice,” Emma says. “I’ll support you either way.”
I lean down and kiss her again. “I wish I could stay. If you asked me, I would, Emma. If you told me you needed me here and to abandon my team, I’d do it.”
“I can’t do that. I want to be with you, but you’re making the right decision, especially if this is your last season. Think about your legacy. Maybe you won’t regret it immediately, but you will one day. Being the man who ran out on his team.” She leans back in my arms and wipes her cheeks. It’s like this is hurting her to say. “I wish we never had to be apart, but this is the real world. We have to be mature about it. We can make it work.”
“Me, mature?” I say, kissing away her tears. “I’m not mature, Emma, just old.”
“Oh, hush. You’re thirty-six. Even if you think you’re ancient in professional athlete years, you’re not ancient in real ones.”
“Either way, people are going to talk. They’re going to call you a gold digger. They’re going to call me a cradle robber.”
“Let them say anything they want,” she hisses passionately, staring up with that captivating fight in her eyes. “I don’t care. If Dad, Mom, and Eric support us, nobody else matters. Just me and you. Just our children.”
I love you, I almost say like I did earlier. I got so close, but I couldn’t crack myself open completely. Not until I know we’re getting our happily ever after if we do.