Total pages in book: 230
Estimated words: 217798 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1089(@200wpm)___ 871(@250wpm)___ 726(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 217798 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1089(@200wpm)___ 871(@250wpm)___ 726(@300wpm)
At least she could answer that particular fear of his. “Your mother knows. I brought it up to her in the beginning. I should have brought it up to you, but honestly, I didn’t want to hear about your past. I was letting it go and moving into the future. I thought you would give me the same courtesy.”
He finally turned. “My mother knows?”
“Yes, I told her, but she explained that she already knew.”
He ran a hand over his hair, messing it up further. “And yet you didn’t think to explain to me that you preferred feminine men? You merely decided to change me into one?”
Change him? Was that what he was worried about? “I’m not trying to change you in any way. I like the way you are. There’s nothing at all wrong with it. You can be strong and still need to submit. It doesn’t make you less of a man.”
His jaw tensed, anger making his whole body rigid. “I do not submit. Not to you. Not to anyone. I’m the king.”
“I never said you weren’t the king. What we do in the privacy of our bedroom, it doesn’t change who you are outside of it. And there’s no weakness in submitting sexually to a partner who understands your needs and supports you. This is about finding one place in the world where you can give up control, where you know you’re safe because your Mistress would never harm you.”
He threw back his head and laughed, a terribly bitter sound. “Safe? You don’t make me safe, Mistress Day. You want to make me weak and you’ve already placed my whole kingdom at risk.”
Perhaps it was how tired she was or the fact that she’d heard it before exactly how wrong she was for being comfortable with herself and her needs, but she was ready to give him what he wanted. She stood and faced him. Blissful numbness had overtaken her and she couldn’t work up the will to cry. She wasn’t strong enough at that moment. It would come later, but for now she stared at the man she’d loved since she was nineteen years old. She wasn’t strong enough to lie to herself anymore. It had always been Kash, from the moment he’d grinned at her in class and winked her way. Back then, he’d been the one who’d made it all right to be who she was, glasses and impulses and all. The funny thing was she would never have walked into a club, never have studied up on dominance and submission, had it not been for Kash. He’d given her the strength to accept herself and now he hated her for it.
“I’ll contact a lawyer after I’ve had some sleep.” There wasn’t anything else she could do. She wasn’t going to stay when it was so clear she was unwelcome.
“A lawyer? I’ve already taken care of it,” Kash insisted. “This time. But there will be a next. I’m sure of it. My god, even Ian Taggart knows who you are.”
She sighed as she walked to the door. “I didn’t mean to take care of your ex-girlfriend. I meant to file for a divorce. Or annulment perhaps. We haven’t actually consummated the marriage, so it might be possible.”
“Divorce?” He said the word like he’d never heard it before.
What exactly did he want from her if he didn’t want to end the marriage? “Yes, Kash. Divorce. You’re so horrified by the fact that I like to take control during sex. You’re horrified that my whorish past might come up, and despite the fact that you’ve slept with every woman on the planet, somehow this will make you less of a man. You’re horrified by me personally. So the simple way to fix the problem is for the two of us to get a divorce. Since I handle everything anyway, I might as well be the one who files. Oh, you can tell everyone it was you, but we both know you’ll be far too lazy to call a lawyer yourself.”
Before she could open the door, he put a hand on it, holding it closed. “Lazy, am I?”
She shouldn’t have said that, but her defenses were down. She shook her head. “We shouldn’t talk anymore until we’ve had some sleep. If Mr. McKay has set us up with only one bed, I’ll take the couch.”
“Shouldn’t the Mistress have the bed? Shouldn’t I sleep on the floor like the good lap dog I am?” He seemed determined to see the worst in everything.
“I never asked you to do that, Kash.”
“But you would have at some point. You were preparing me to be your boy. I believe the term is grooming. You were grooming me to accept being your slave.”
Naturally he would see it that way. “I was trying to bring you comfort.”