Total pages in book: 24
Estimated words: 22147 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 111(@200wpm)___ 89(@250wpm)___ 74(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 22147 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 111(@200wpm)___ 89(@250wpm)___ 74(@300wpm)
I wave one last time at Tommy and get into my beat-up hatchback with the fake pleather seats. Tommy’s carseat is in the back and I tear up a bit as I catch a glimpse of it in the rearview mirror. But such is life. I have to move on, and with one more wave, I pull the car away from the curb and start driving to school.
When I pull into the campus parking lot, who’s waiting for me but Elisa.
“Hey girl!” she waves, putting out a cigarette with the heel of one tall, black boot. “Took you long enough!”
“I know, I know,” I say, getting out of my car. “Sorry, but Tommy didn’t want to eat his cereal, and it took all my energy just to get him to take two bites. Good thing his babysitter arrived just in time.”
Elisa shoots me an empathetic look.
“Sorry to hear that, kiddo. I know it’s hard for you to leave your son every time you come to campus, but he’s going to be fine, Aria. You love your babysitter.”
I nod bravely.
“I do. Haley is great, and she’s insanely talented when it comes to children. Tommy’s in good hands.”
Elisa nods happily and hooks her arm through mine.
“So you ready for Comp Lit 101 then? We’ll be discussing the role of erotica in modern literature in today’s lecture.”
I choke down a laugh because sometimes it feels like I’ve never been away. Elisa is still the same as always. She’s a flighty co-ed who continues to read only the first few chapters of each book. She goes out constantly, and has a different boyfriend every month, if not every week.
But of course, everything’s different. For one, Elisa and I are no longer roommates. I moved into off-campus housing provided by the school for student parents, while Elisa’s still staying in the cramped dorms.
More importantly, my life has done a one-eighty. Even though I’m finishing my English major, my perspective has changed altogether. I’m a mom now, and I have a son whom I adore. Life’s not about parties, studying, and boys anymore. It’s about my child, and making sure he has a wonderful future.
Still, I think of Roland sometimes. Does he ever think about me? He’s so handsome that I’m sure he found another girlfriend within a week of my disappearance. Plus, I heard he made it out of the investigation in one piece, and that his reputation has been restored to its former glory. Good. I’m happy for him, even if I can’t tell him that in person.
“So are you ready for midterms?” Elisa asks carelessly.
“No,” I say in a wry voice. “Definitely not.”
“Oh well,” she says with a wink. “I know you’ll pull it out anyways, Aria. You always land on your feet,” she adds as we stroll to class arm in arm.
But then I stop and turn towards her.
“But that’s not true, Lissie. I mean, look at me. I’m an unwed mother, with a fatherless son, who’s only surviving because of the generosity of my parents. They pay for everything you know, from my housing, to the babysitter, to all of Tommy’s food and clothes.”
Elisa nods, her expression thoughtful.
“I know, but they were doing that anyways before you got pregnant right? So they’re just continuing what they’ve always done.”
“Yes, that’s true,” I say with a sad smile. “But I’m not some model citizen, Elisa. I didn’t land on my feet, not this time. I’m an unwed mother, for crying out loud! I’m what mothers warn their daughters not to become.”
But Elisa doesn’t look fazed.
“I know you feel like the world’s totally out of control, and that you’re out of control too, but it’s not like that, Aria. You’re fine. Your baby is fine. This is all going to recede into the past. By the way, did you ever tell the father about Tommy?” she says, wrinkling her brow at me. “I know you wanted to keep it a secret, but don’t you think the dad has a right to know?”
I take a deep breath.
“I know I’ve never revealed the identity of my baby’s dad, but I promise, it’s for good cause. He’s a man that I fell in love with, and there are a lot of reasons why I never told him about his child.”
Lissie looks thoughtful for a moment.
“It’s not because he’s married, right?”
I shake my head vehemently.
“No, he’s definitely not married. At least, back then he wasn’t. But after I withdrew from school, I lost touch with him so maybe he’s married now. I don’t know.”
The words pierce me to my heart because what if Roland’s married now? What if he has a bright shiny wife on his arm, who’s dazzling and beautiful and amazing? I’d feel like such an ugly troll by comparison, with my baby weight saddling my hips while wearing frumpy, shapeless pregnancy clothes. She’d be a supernova while I’m a faded, dull grey rock by comparison.