Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 93984 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 93984 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
Gabriel took a deep breath and lowered the gun. A glance at the clock revealed that it was only four in the morning. He couldn’t have been asleep for more than an hour.
After getting off the phone with Marilyn, he’d hidden in the guest room, thinking about what Justin had said. Yes, he had an exit strategy for when it came time to leave the business, but things were damned complicated. In truth, he’d never really expected to live long enough to actually use it.
But living with Justin over the past three weeks had made him want things like a normal life. And in the center of that normal life were Justin’s goofy grin and annoying little quirks that just made everything so much better.
It was dangerous to want things, though. And wanting Justin put him in incredible danger.
Justin deserved better than his evasions and non-answers. The man had bared his soul, taken a chance that Gabriel might feel the same and would be willing to meet him halfway.
Gabriel needed to give him at least some of the truth. God knew he was in as deep as Justin at this point. Justin needed to know that he wasn’t alone in this. But Gabriel wasn’t ready to tell him everything. Not only would it put Justin in danger, but it was a mess that Gabriel couldn’t even bring himself to put into words. At least, not yet.
Sighing, Gabriel grabbed a pair of sleep pants out of the dresser and pulled them on. He wandered downstairs to find Justin in the kitchen. He was brewing a pot of coffee. Standing with his arms folded over his chest, he glared at the coffeemaker as it if had somehow pissed him off.
Even angry, with bulging muscles, there was something adorable about him, with his sleep-tousled hair standing up in all directions and his bleary eyes. He looked warm and snuggly, and Gabriel was sure that if he wrapped his arms around him, he’d feel it too. Fuck, he should have just climbed into bed with him.
Of course, there was a good chance that Justin would slug him if Gabriel tried it. The mercenary had every right to be pissed at Gabriel.
“Brianna?” Gabriel asked when he didn’t see Justin’s phone.
“She’s calling back in ten minutes. Told her I needed coffee before she started spouting all her medical nonsense at me.”
Gabriel grunted and slid into one of the breakfast bar chairs as he watched Justin. The man was too stiff. Hurting. And he couldn’t let that continue.
“My life is complicated, Justin,” Gabriel started hesitantly.
Justin narrowed his eyes and looked at him like he was a fucking idiot.
Gabriel sighed and looked at the counter under his arms. It was a bad start. Justin’s life was probably complicated as well. “Five years ago, they killed my partner because he was gay. They tortured him and killed him.”
He glanced up to find that some of the anger left Justin’s face. Justin took a step toward him, but Gabriele couldn’t hold his gaze, so he stared at the marble counter again.
“Partner in your work…or partner as in—”
“Both, actually.” Gabriel swallowed hard. He’d never spoken about Ivan to anyone. There had never been anyone in his life he felt close or safe enough to share his thoughts and feelings with. The words kept getting lodged in his throat, but he forced them out. Justin deserved to know the truth. “I think he knew they were close. He sent me away for a day to case a target. There was nothing unusual about it, but something…something felt off. But for some reason, it wasn’t enough to stop me. When I returned, he was dead. We kept a video camera in our rooms for security. I saw everything they did to him.”
“G…”
Gabriel shook his head to stop any kind words from Justin’s lips. He had to get this out or he never would. “I figured if they knew about Ivan, then they knew about me. I would be the next target. I faked my death, went underground for a year. When I resurfaced, I had a new look, new name. I took my place in the world as an assassin, and I was looking out for me only. No more partners.”
“So, you’ve been alone for the past five years.”
A bark of laughter full of bitterness broke free of Gabriel’s throat. “I’ve always been alone. Ivan…well, Ivan wasn’t you. There was sex and work. I don’t think it really mattered if we both enjoyed it. It was just physical contact. It was not pretending for a few minutes a day. We didn’t talk or laugh.”
“Did you love him?”
Gabriel’s lips shifted, part smile and part frown. “In a way, I guess. He was my first. He accepted me for me. His last act in the world was to protect me.”