Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 58808 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 294(@200wpm)___ 235(@250wpm)___ 196(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 58808 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 294(@200wpm)___ 235(@250wpm)___ 196(@300wpm)
Hugh was whispering comforting nonsense too, stroking Eric’s arms and back soothingly. That was what alphas did after knotting, Eric thought distantly. At least that was what good alphas did. Coming down from a knotting high could be brutal for an omega. But of course Hugh wouldn’t allow that to happen to Eric. Hugh was wonderful, and protective, and just wonderful. Had Eric mentioned that he was wonderful? Eric loved him so much. He loved him so much he felt like he was overflowing with that emotion. Hugh was… he was—
Eric’s eyes snapped open, panic and horror washing over him in waves as the reality of what they’d done finally penetrated his hazy mind. The knot in him had softened enough to pull out, which was what Hugh was currently doing with a wince on his face.
Their eyes locked together.
Silence fell, heavy and loaded.
Eric swallowed. “How big is the chance of me getting pregnant from this?” The information was stored somewhere in his mind, but right now Eric was too busy freaking out to remember.
Hugh looked away. “This far from your heat… approximately twenty-one percent for ovulation. But there are other factors to consider, so the chances of pregnancy are lower.”
Okay. Twenty-one percent wasn’t all that bad. It wasn’t a total disaster—if he disregarded the fact that he’d just had unprotected sex with a man who wasn’t his husband. Sure, Greg had practically encouraged him to sleep with Hugh, but that changed nothing. Eric didn’t feel guilty, per se—he and Greg had no personal relationship to betray.
Then what was this tight, uneasy feeling in his gut?
Fear.
He was scared. He was scared shitless. He was scared he couldn’t do casual sex, like Greg had implied. Not with Hugh.
“This was obviously a mistake,” Eric said, reaching down for his pants and putting them on with trembling, clumsy fingers. “It shouldn’t have happened, and won’t happen again.”
Hugh said nothing.
“It won’t happen again,” Eric repeated, without looking at him. “It can’t.”
“Why did you marry him?”
The seemingly out-of-the-blue question startled Eric enough to look at Hugh.
The alpha was regarding him intently, looking impeccable, as if he wasn’t the same man who’d been rutting into him a short while ago.
“He was a good choice,” Eric said tonelessly. “We get along.”
“Get along,” Hugh repeated. “You deserved better than ‘getting along’ with your husband—a man old enough to be your grandfather who won’t even prioritize your needs over some stupid religion.”
Eric’s eyes were suddenly stinging. “I guess I didn’t deserve better,” he said, turning away. “I’m… content with my life, really. It isn’t what I wanted it to be, but I’m okay. It could have been much worse.”
“If you’re thinking of your married life in terms of ‘it could have been worse,’ then no, you aren’t okay, Eri.”
Whirling around, Eric glowered at him. “What do you want me to say?” he snapped. “That I’m unhappy? That I’m still pining after you? Are you that conceited?”
Hugh’s eyebrows drew together. “I wasn’t aware that there ever was any pining,” he said carefully. “I was under the impression that it was just a childish imprint.”
Eric’s face felt far too warm. “Stop playing dumb, Hugh. You’re a goddamn expert on omegas—don’t tell me you didn’t recognize that I was infatuated with you. But it wasn’t convenient for you, so you pretended to be oblivious. Guess what? You can stop pretending now, because there’s no need.” He lifted his chin and said a blatant lie, “I’m over my stupid infatuation—have been over it for years. I may not have a loving marriage, but it doesn’t mean I’ve been wasting away without you. I’ve had plenty of entertainment.”
Hugh’s eyes narrowed. “What is that supposed to mean?” he said, stepping closer.
Eric smiled. He wasn’t sure where this was coming from, but it felt so good not to be seen by Hugh as a pathetic besotted kid. “It means what I said. You aren’t special to me anymore. Just another alpha to use for his knot.”
“You’re lying,” Hugh said, boring a hole in him with his eyes.
“I’m not. Why would I lie about it?” Eric shrugged and looked at Hugh’s clenched hand. “What’s the matter? Did you actually enjoy being the object of my infatuation? Does it bother you that you mean nothing to me?”
“You’re lying,” Hugh said again, his voice nearly a growl, the air thickening with alpha pheromones to such an extent that Eric could barely breathe without moaning, his cock twitching and his hole getting wet again.
“I’m not,” Eric said with a shrug. “You’re just one of the many alphas I’ve had fun with. Frankly, my husband and I have an understanding. It was actually Greg who convinced me to fuck you. I wasn’t all that interested—”
Hugh slammed their mouths together, grabbing his face roughly and all but shoving his tongue down Eric’s throat. Eric tried not to respond to keep the appearance of indifference, but it was a lost battle: he was already sucking on Hugh’s tongue with shameless moans, kissing back as ravenously as Hugh was kissing him. It felt painfully, achingly good, the sense of oh-gods-finally making his head spin. He wanted to devour this man, swallow him whole and keep him inside him, always, in every possible way.