Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 77717 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 259(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77717 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 259(@300wpm)
The next video clip that plays showcases breastfeeding fetishes. I wrinkle my nose. “Sick.” I go to click away when the doorbell rings, causing the dogs to rush into the foyer barking.
“Hey, Lauren!” my sister calls, stepping inside. “We were in town and thought we’d stop by and say hi.”
“Hey!” I call back and get up to grab the dogs.
Soft moaning comes from the living room, followed by a woman’s voice saying, “I’m so full for you, baby. Drink up. It’s all for you, baby.”
Oh shit. The computer.
“Uh, is this a bad time?” Katie asks, green eyes going wide the same time as her nose wrinkles in disgust. “You weren’t masturbating or anything, were you? We can leave.”
“No!” I exclaim, horribly embarrassed. “It’s not what you think.”
Katie can’t look at me. “Yeah, explain that please. But first turn whatever the hell you’re watching off.”
My cheeks are burning red as I slam my laptop shut. Now Katie and Jenny are laughing as they wait for me to explain.
“I was doing research.”
“Research, really. Come on, Lauren, you can do better than that,” Katie says.
“Not research on grown men drinking breastmilk! That video came up automatically. I might have been looking up sex positions that are safe during pregnancy.” My hand settles on the small baby bump and my gaze stays steady on the floor, unable to face my sisters.
Jenny raises an eyebrow. “And why are you interested in that?”
Shit. Busted.
Katie laughs again. “Glad to see you stuck to your word about not sleeping with Noah.”
“I said that like two months ago,” I spit out. “Things change. He’s changed.”
The amusement vanishes from Katie’s face. “You sure about that?”
With a sigh, I sink back onto the couch and wait for Jenny and Katie to take a seat before continuing. “Yes. Well, maybe he hasn’t changed, but I’m seeing a different side of him. Yeah, he’s made some really bad choices and put himself first before, but he’s not like that now. When he’s with me he’s kind, and caring. As far as I know, he’s been on his best behavior since I told him I’m pregnant.”
“I hope it lasts,” Katie says. “And I don’t mean that as in insult to you, Lauren.”
“I know.” And I do know. Noah has been perfect the last two months, but what are months of being good compared to years of being the bad boy?
Is having his baby enough to change him? And am I enough to make him stay changed?
“So, how is it?” Katie asks.
“How’s what?”
“The sex. I always assumed he was well versed with a woman’s body.”
I get a flash of his head between my legs. Maybe I will call him once my sisters leave. He’ll come over for a booty call no matter what. “He’s very well versed,” I say with a smile.
“Well, good,” Katie says. “So you’re happy?”
“Yes,” I reply without having to think about it. “As crazy and scary as this has been, things are good between Noah and I, and the baby’s doing fine. This is still far from what I planned for my life, but I’m okay with it.” The revelation hits me as the words leave my mouth. Just when did I become okay with this? Probably the same time Noah went from being that guy who knocked me up to something … more.
Someone more.
“I’m glad,” Jenny starts. “Colin and I were really worried for a while. Noah doesn’t play by the rules.” I turn to look at her. Her eyes aren’t on me, but are on the bags of baby stuff Noah and I got today from Babies R Us. She’s sad, and I wonder if she’s thinking it should be her instead.
Because I’ve thought that a few times before.
And it should be. Not that I’d trade my little baby for anything, but if I could shift everything to next year and let her have the first grandchild, I totally would.
Katie gets up to use the bathroom and tension grows between Jenny and me. Do I need to say something? Let her know I’m sorry and don’t mean to make her sad? Crap. I hate awkward situations like this.
“Jenny,” I start, not able to look at her. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, Lauren,” she says, knowing exactly what I’m talking about.
“I know it’s not fair, and I never meant to hurt you.”
“Lauren, I know you didn’t do this to hurt me,” she spits.
I bite my lip and nod, forcing myself to look up. I expect her to look sad, not pissed. My eyes widen.
“Sorry,” she says, shaking her head. “But it isn’t fair. Why do you get to have a baby that you didn’t try for and I can’t get pregnant. But what makes it worse is him.”
My heart is in my throat. I hate being yelled at in any way. “Him?”
“Noah. It’s not fair he gets to have a kid, gets to be a dad. Do you know the strain he’s put on my marriage? The time I’ve spent fighting with Colin because he was out late with Noah, or wants another motorcycle so they can ride together again? He’s the last person who deserves a baby. And now he’s going to be part of the family forever. Even if you two never speak again, I will be the aunt to Noah’s kid.”