Total pages in book: 84
Estimated words: 79040 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 395(@200wpm)___ 316(@250wpm)___ 263(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79040 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 395(@200wpm)___ 316(@250wpm)___ 263(@300wpm)
His lips crash against mine. It’s not soft or tender like I expect. It’s hungry and frantic.
His big hand slides up the nape of my neck and he takes a fistful of my hair, tugging my face back gently to give him better access. I kiss him back like my life depends on it, because it feels like more than a kiss. It feels like fantasy. Like magic. It feels like fireworks are going off inside my head and beneath my skin, spreading prickles of molten electricity through my veins.
I’m not sure how long we kiss, but he eventually pulls back, hand still in my hair. I’m gasping for air. I’m not even sure I was breathing.
“Okay,” I say.
“Okay,” he agrees.
Sarah has brought her little face so close that I jump and scream in surprise once I open my eyes. She’s just inches from our faces.
Jameson laughs, and Sarah lifts her claw up to his face with her sloth-like slowness, touching his cheek. He rubs her head and smiles sadly. “Sorry, girl. It was best for you to see how serious things are first hand. I know that couldn’t have been easy.”
Sarah reaches past Jameson and grabs a leaf from a basket. She brings it to her mouth and starts munching.
His eyes flick to mine. “She moves on quickly.”
I glance toward the two workers and both are pointedly keeping their backs to us. I wonder if that’s for privacy’s sake, or if they really didn’t notice that kiss. It’s hard to imagine anyone not noticing a kiss like that. I felt like there must have been a spotlight on us–like pulsating, sexy music must have been playing from speakers in the floor and ceiling.
I’m already wondering if it could’ve really been as amazing as I remember and it was only seconds ago.
“Want to see the rest of the zoo?” Jameson asks.
“Yeah,” I say. “I’d like that.”
I spend the rest of the night in a daze. My mind spins with the memory of his lips brushing against mine and the crackling potential I felt between us. Is that what a first kiss is supposed to be? Like grabbing a live wire with both hands and trying to hold on for dear life? Because every other first kiss I’ve had felt like a single, solitary spark hitting me on the cheek. That was my entire body submerged in icy hot fire and little winged fairies singing opera in my ears.
That kiss came against my walls like a ten ton hammer.
I feel the cracks already forming. I was so sure I could shield my heart until I had time to heal. I was so sure Vaughn was the last man I’d give a chance to hurt me like that. It’s one of the only ways I’ve managed to keep my sanity during all this. I know it won’t happen again. That has been my armor.
But as I walk through the dangling lights and laugh at decorations with Jameson in the Central Park Zoo, I don’t feel so safe anymore. I feel like a layer of my protection has been peeled back and I’m right here in the night for him, exposed and vulnerable.
I squeeze his hand tighter. “Can I really trust you?” I ask him as we’re watching two adorable otters float on their backs while holding rocks with their tiny arms.
He meets my eyes. I like that he doesn’t answer right away. He spends several long moments, apparently searching himself to decide how he can answer me. “You can trust me,” he says.
I kiss him. Maybe I’ll regret letting my guard down later. But for tonight?
Tonight I’m going to ride with my seatbelt off, the wind in my hair, and my eyes closed, because fuck Vaughn and fuck the way he has tried to rob me of my happiness.
“I was thinking…” Jameson says. We’ve moved to a bench behind the otter exhibit, sandwiched between two scarecrows and a pile of pumpkins. His arm is around me and my head is leaned into him, drinking in the warmth of his big body. “It might be best if we clear the tension in the air. Before the big day.”
I look up at him. “How do you mean?”
“Well,” he sighs theatrically. “There’s clearly sexual tension between us. It might look suspicious. Why so much tension if we’re supposedly together, right?”
I squint up at him. “You’re going to have to spell it out for me, Jameson.” My heart is pounding, though, because I know exactly what he’s getting at. I’m just too much of a chicken to leave my interpretation up to chance. I want him to say it plain and clear for me. No doubts. No risk.
He lowers his mouth to my ear, and his voice is warm chocolate running down my spine. “I want to take you back to my place, lay you on my bed, and do unspeakable things to you. Otherwise, I’m going to have trouble keeping my hands off you at the mixer.”