Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 83211 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 416(@200wpm)___ 333(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83211 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 416(@200wpm)___ 333(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
“Hey,” I say, smiling at him. “How was your evening?”
He narrows his eyes. “I’m going to kill you.”
“What did he do?” Maddox asks.
Jess and I stare at each other. The longer it continues, the more amusing it gets. The more amused I become, the angrier he gets. It’s a vicious cycle.
“What did I do?” I ask, smirking. “Jess wasn’t a fan of the big cock.”
Sara snorts.
“I got him a bunch of little cocks instead,” I say.
Jess turns to Maddox. “He fucking bought a dozen baby chickens and put them in my bathtub.”
Maddox and Ashley burst out laughing. Sara grabs a pillow and covers her face.
“Twelve?” I ask, my forehead wrinkling. “There should’ve been thirteen.”
Jess’s head whips back to me. “There are twelve. We counted.”
I grimace. “So did I. I actually got a deal on a baker’s dozen because the girl working at the farm supply store thought I was a cutie.” I shrug. “Her words, not mine.”
“What, the actual fuck, am I supposed to do with a dozen fucking chickens, Banks? What were you thinking?”
“I was thinking that you’d relate more to baby cocks. I was trying to do you a favor.”
He leans forward, planting his hands on the island. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Me? What’s wrong with you? I gave you a perfectly good giant chicken, and you put my name on the Golden Years Dating app, and I still have women on retirement pensions calling my phone leaving me really filthy messages that make me uncomfortable.”
Sara giggles.
I turn to her. “You—hush.”
She lifts her brows and points at me. “You have enough problems on your hands tonight. Don’t start with me.”
“Don’t start with you?” I ask, unable to keep from bantering with her. My God, she’s gorgeous. “How did your date go this afternoon?”
She smirks. “It went amazingly well.”
“Oh, did you and Becca find some nice seashells or what?”
Her smirk twists into a grin. But before she can retort, Jess slams his hands on the countertop.
“Can we focus here?” he booms.
“I was,” I whisper.
This only irritates him more. “Do you know what Pippa is doing right now?”
I pretend to think about it. “No. There’s really no way for me to know, but if you want me to guess, I’d say—”
“She’s sitting on the bathroom floor with chickens crawling all around designing a chicken coop and calling herself a chicken mom.”
“I don’t think chickens crawl,” I say. “You're a chicken dad now. You better know these things.”
He grits his teeth together.
“Baby chickens are cute,” Ashley says.
“Then I’ll bring them over here. They peep,” Jess says. “Loud. A lot. And they shit. And stink.”
“The girl at the farm supply store said that if you keep their nesting material clean, they wouldn’t smell. I got some extra bedding for you. It’s in the back of my truck.”
Jess glares at me before heading for the door. “I’m going home to disinfect my bathtub and try to convince Pippa to find a nice home for twelve fucking chicks.”
“You better find that thirteenth one,” I shout before the door slams shut.
As soon as Jess is gone, the room erupts in laughter.
A deep gratification from Jess’s annoyance ripples through me. He thought he would have the last laugh? I think not.
“Chicks, Banks?” Maddox asks, amused. “Where do you come up with this stuff?”
“It’s a talent.”
“Are you ever going to let this go with Jess?” Ashley asks.
“Well, Maddox said I couldn’t put spiders in Foxx’s car. I have to keep myself entertained somehow. Besides,” I say, moving into the living room. “What would be worse than getting texts and calls throughout the day? I’ll tell you what—something you can’t just turn off. I can put my phone on my desk or turn off the ringer. What can he do with chickens?”
Sara grins. “He can give them to a farm.”
“Not when Pippa loves them.” My laughter sounds like a villain’s, but I can’t help it. “He’ll have to keep them. Forever.”
Maddox sighs.
“What if he can’t find the last one?” Ashley asks. “The poor little thing. Could it have hopped out of the tub? Can chicks fly?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. But there were only twelve. I just want him to have to look for the thirteenth one for a while.”
Sara laughs. The sound makes my dick hard.
“The dating app crossed a line,” I say, finding myself staring at Sara. I gotta get the hell out of here. “On that note, I’m going to take my tape and go.”
“Wait,” Maddox says.
Here we go … “I really can’t. I have something, you know, falling apart at my house, and I need the tape to put it back together.” Not bad for thinking on my feet. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Banks, please,” Ashley says, standing. “We need a favor.”
I cringe. No. No, no, no.
“Banks,” Sara says, cooing my name like the sweet innocent angel she isn’t. “I was hoping we could have a conversation.”