Total pages in book: 24
Estimated words: 22029 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 110(@200wpm)___ 88(@250wpm)___ 73(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 22029 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 110(@200wpm)___ 88(@250wpm)___ 73(@300wpm)
“Hey, are you okay in there?” someone calls out.
I wipe my face with the back of my hands. “Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks.”
I’m anything but fine.
Gathering my things, I leave the bathroom, praying that whoever is in there doesn’t know me. I don’t want to have to explain myself and I don’t want sympathy. The whole “everything is going to be okay,” mantra doesn’t feel like it’s going to work for me right now.
Back in my room, I try calling Liam again, but he doesn’t answer. I hang up and try again but get the same damn message. I want to scream.
The door opens and Katelyn walks in. She sees me and her eyes go wide. “What’s wrong?”
This is one of those Band-Aid moments where you just rip it off and pray for the best.
“I’m pregnant,” I tell her. “At least, I’m pretty sure I am. I’m late and took a test, and it’s positive, and . . .” I sit on the edge of my bed and look at her. She says nothing and I imagine she’s running the same scenario through her mind that I am—this isn’t how Liam and I planned things.
Wetness coats my cheeks. I let the tears fall. There isn’t anything I can do about them, the lump in my throat, or the tightening of my heart so why bother try to stop any of it. I fucked up. Eighteen, in college and pregnant.
My parents are going to kill me.
Maybe not my mom so much, but my dad for sure.
“Have you told Liam?”
I shake my head. “I called, but he didn’t answer. They lost today so I think he’s just dealing with that. And this isn’t something you leave on voicemail, ya know? Do you think I should go see him?”
Katelyn shrugs. “I mean, yes you should, but also, I think you should tell him as soon as you talk to him because he needs to know.”
She’s right. Over the phone it is.
“He’s going to be so angry.”
Katelyn nods. “Liam loves you. Sure, he’ll be pissed at first but it’ll all work out. Maybe he can transfer here?”
I shake my head. “He’s too good for this school. No offense.”
“None taken because I know he his. So is Mason, but here we are.”
Katelyn comes over and sits next to me. She wraps her arm around me, and my head falls onto her shoulder. I sob. Cry an ocean of tears for this colossal fuck up. I can’t believe this has happened.
“Please don’t tell anyone. I need to figure things out and really want Liam to know first.”
“Of course, it’ll be our secret.” She runs her hand up and down my hair. “Are you sure it was positive?”
I nod against her. “I bought two tests and this one was positive. I’ll take the other one in the morning.”
“Okay, that’s good. Then we can go to the nurse’s office,” she says. “She can give you another one, just to be sure. You don’t want to tell Liam and then have it be wrong.”
“You’re right,” I say and then start thinking that maybe the one I took was wrong.
Only, in the morning it’s positive again.
chapter 6
. . .
It’s been a couple of days, and I haven’t had a chance to tell Liam. It’s not for a lack of trying. He hasn’t called me back and I don’t want to be a pain in the ass even though I need to be a pain in the ass.
After dinner, I head back to my dorm with a group of girls from our floor. We chat about nothing and yet, it’s everything. I’m going to miss being a part of the school, being on campus, and making friends. I think once I tell Liam, he’ll have me move to Texas. It’s the only thing that will truly work. I don’t want to be here without him, and I know he’ll want to be with me while I’m carrying his child.
When I get upstairs and in my room, I stand in front of the mirror Katelyn and I bought and lift up my shirt. It’s one of Liam’s shirts that I’ve stolen over the years. I figure I should start wearing it now because it’s so big, that by the time I start showing no one will notice my sudden change to baggy clothes. And with Mason on campus, I can take his shirts next.
I stand there, with my shirt lifted, looking at my flat stomach. It’s weird to think there’s a baby growing in there. One created out of love. I rest my hand against my skin and smile. “Mommy and daddy love you so much,” I say as I stare at myself. I know Liam’s going to love this baby as much as I do.
Since the second test, when no one is around I refer to myself as mommy. It’s the only way I can wrap my head around what Liam and I have done. I want this baby and I know Liam will as well once I tell him. We’re going to be a family, like we’ve talked about. It’s just happening a bit sooner.