Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 78387 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 392(@200wpm)___ 314(@250wpm)___ 261(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 78387 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 392(@200wpm)___ 314(@250wpm)___ 261(@300wpm)
Mom insists on sitting on my bed, regardless of how uncomfortable it makes me. “I’m so happy to see you awake.”
“Me too,” I say because let’s be honest, it would suck not to wake up from this.
“I had a chat with Elle while you were in surgery. You really need to create a will, honey.”
I close my eyes so she can’t see how disgusted I am by her comment. This is not the time, nor place.
“It’s unfair that she’d get your portion of your house if something were to happen to you.”
“She gets my sperm too,” I snap, and her eyes widen. “And she can do whatever she wants with it.”
“Benjamin.”
“I’m tired.” I close my eyes without waiting to see her leave. Except she doesn’t. She gets off my bed and turns the television on. Mom channel surfs until she finds Wheel of Fortune. Brad and her start trying to answer the puzzles, while I lie there, trying to heal. What in the fuck is wrong with them? Is this what they consider visiting?
I cough, in a weak attempt to get their attention. When neither of them looks at me, I press the call button for the nurse. Right now, I wish I had to stay in ICU or something where they limit my visitors to one. But nope, general population it is for me.
“What do you need, Ben?” the nurse asks as she comes in. She goes right to my machines, making sure everything is okay. I let my eyes do all the talking and dart them back and forth between her and my family. She nods and tells them she needs to check out my incision and they need to leave the room for a bit.
Brad squeezes my foot when he walks by my bed, but mom peppers me with kisses, telling me how much she loves me. Sometimes I think it’s a phrase she says because society tells her it’s the right thing to do. I’m not sure she loves anyone except herself. And maybe Brad. She was at least married to his father, while mine just used her—according to her.
“Thank you,” I say to the nurse after my family leaves.
“You’re welcome. You’re our priority, Ben. Anything you need, we’re here.”
“I appreciate it.”
“You do have a waiting room of people though. Your friends are really giving us nurses all the feels.”
I chuckle. I can’t imagine who she’s referring to. “Oh yeah?”
“It seems you’re friends with some pretty famous people.”
“Ah, yes. I’m a lucky guy.”
She rests her hand on my shoulder and laughs. “Or they’re lucky to have you.”
Elle returns and she has a shit-eating grin on her face. “What did you do?” I ask, knowing full well she’s done something. I love her, but she’s evil sometimes.
“I sent everyone home.,” she tells me. “I figured you’d want some time to rest, and the doctor says you’re going to be groggy for a bit. I didn’t want you to agree to anything without being fully aware of what you’re saying.”
She is kind. She is beautiful. But damn, she breaks my heart. “Thank you. Does this mean you’re leaving as well?” I don’t know how I feel about my question. I want her to stay, but I also don’t. Knowing she’s here, but not fully here hurts.
“I was planning to sleep in the chair over there. Unless you’d like me to leave. You need your rest, but I know I’m causing you stress right now. It’s your choice.”
It’s not going to matter what I choose. I’ll be wrong. I don’t want her to go, but I don’t want her to stay. I’d love to have things both ways, but I can’t.
I nod and say, “You can stay, but under one condition.”
“What’s that?”
“Well, actually two conditions. No, make that three. I need some Jell-O, preferably green. I also want some real food, so maybe some In-N-Out, and you sleep next to me. I know the bed is small, but I sleep better when you’re near me.”
“Okay,” she says as she sits on the edge of my bed. “I agree to all those conditions.”
“Perfect.”
“Before I go get dinner and hunt down the Jell-O can we talk about your treatment?”
I shrug, knowing this won’t go well.
“I’ve done some research, and while your oncologist is good, he’s not the best.”
“He’s covered by my insurance,” I tell her. “And I like him.”
“I get it, and I’m not trying to be pushy, but you deserve to have the best treatment possible and if insurance is in the way, I fear you won’t get it.”
“I’ll be fine, Elle.”
Her face falls. I know she wants to be in charge, bark orders, and tell everyone what to do, but this is my battle, and mine alone. I’ll take her support, but that’s it. I let her convince me on the whole sperm thing, but on treatment, I’m standing firm.