Total pages in book: 27
Estimated words: 27737 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 139(@200wpm)___ 111(@250wpm)___ 92(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 27737 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 139(@200wpm)___ 111(@250wpm)___ 92(@300wpm)
"I-I'm s-sorry, s-si—-"
Giancarlo raises a hand, and she shuts up even as she starts to cry.
My own unease turns to shock when I listen to Giancarlo make a call. A few moments later, the girl is being escorted out of the house...for good.
"W-What—-"
Giancarlo only looks at me, and I snap my mouth shut.
Fuck.
I know manners mean everything to their famiglia, but what the fuck?
I march past him and throw the door open to his study.
He enters right behind me, and a crazy mix of emotions rages through me as I stare at him. He shuts the door, and as soon as he turns to face me again—-
"What the hell was that?" I burst out. "It's her first day, for fuck's sake. She just happened to be at the wrong place—-"
"That's reason enough."
"Are you fucking—-"
"The day Martino and his friends were able to abduct you—-"
My face whitens.
"It was because you were at the wrong place, too. Weren't you?"
I can't believe Giancarlo of all people would bring that up without warning.
"Fuck you—-"
"No, Sarica. Fuck them."
It's my first time to hear him drop an F-bomb, and it makes me take a step back—-
"Do you remember asking me why I saved you?"
—-not out of fear, but pain.
"Do you remember me telling you that it was something I needed to do?"
Because even though his tone hasn't changed at all, every word he speaks now is breaking my heart.
"And how I didn't care if I died trying?"
It's the past all over again, dammit.
One moment, I feel like I'm the fucking victim between us, but the next thing I know, I'm the one with a tiny head bump while it's Giancarlo once again bleeding to death in front of me.
"All these years, I couldn't make up my mind if I ever had to tell you the truth. It's one of the few things in life I found myself...indecisive. But after what happened tonight..."
His lips twist, and my own heart twists alongside it in shared pain.
"All it takes is for a person to be at the wrong place, Sarica, and you can lose everything...the way I lost everything."
His face has turned into an expressionless mask.
And yet I could've sworn I heard his heart crack with every word he uttered.
"The night my father and grandfather were ambushed...I should've been there. With them. But I wasn't. I was at the wrong place. And...that was all it took."
No. Oh no. No.
I don't want to hear this, God.
I can't.
But it's too late.
The moment Giancarlo's voice turns hoarse, something inside of me starts to stir.
And the moment I see him close his eyes as if his own eyes have him trapped, it's that same thing which comes into life—-
No. No. No.
I watch Giancarlo's fists clench as he fights off his demons. I watch him drag air into his lungs as he frees himself from the past all on his own. When he opens his eyes again, it's the same Giancarlo that I know.
The same Giancarlo that has been by my side for the past four years.
He looks at me again, and it's the same dark eyes that have been watching me...and watching over me all this time.
"Do you understand now?"
His voice is gentle once more. It's as if I only imagined the hoarseness I heard earlier. It's only as if I imagined his pain. And vulnerability. But I know I didn't, and I also know I'll never be able to forget it...even if I wished I could.
"That is all it takes to lose everything. To be at the wrong place."
Yes, dammit.
How can I not get it when he's cut his heart out just to make his point?
"And so do you also understand why I will never let you go?"
To deny this would be a lie, but even so—-
"We both know you're not stupid," I say stiltedly. "So you have to know that it's not your fault—-"
"You have never been stupid either," Giancarlo interjects flatly, "but did you not once blame yourself for being abducted and almost raped?"
"That's in the past—-"
"But if you found out another girl is to be abducted and raped, and you have a chance to put a stop to it, would you not do everything to save her?"
Fuck.
I hate, hate, hate this part of him, too.
I hate it when he's always the one to remind me that both of us are peas from the same fucking pod.
I hate it when he makes it sound like the two of us together makes beautiful sense.
I hate it, dammit.
But not as much as I fear it, and that's why—-
"What's up with this, anyway?"
I find myself changing the subject like a coward, and all so I don't have to hear him say words that make it seem like the two of us are destined.
Because we're fucking not.
"You've never bothered to speak with me in private. So why are you suddenly—-"