Total pages in book: 128
Estimated words: 125020 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 625(@200wpm)___ 500(@250wpm)___ 417(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 125020 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 625(@200wpm)___ 500(@250wpm)___ 417(@300wpm)
I wave her off. “Never mind me. I want to hear all about you and how you’ve been married to one of Ven’s friends all this time and we’ve never known about it.”
“You have that kind of time?”
“Sure do.”
As long as she’s talking, I don’t have to think about my own situation. So I sit and listen. My mind is blown when she’s done. I have so many questions.
“You hungry? I’m going to head down for something to drink.”
“Um, I’m going to make a few calls. I’ll meet you downstairs,” I say.
“Cool, see you in a bit.”
I call Zoe quickly to let her know I’m settled. Then I stand staring at my phone wondering if I should at least text Josh to warn him that I’m here. The sound of my door closing causes me to turn.
There Josh stands, staring back at me. I frown and go to leave the room. I get my hand on the handle, but he cages me in with his hands against the door, preventing me from opening it.
“We’re not leaving this room until you talk to me,” he breathes in my ear.
“We have nothing to say. I can’t trust you.”
“I have never lied to you. You’re my wife. How can you not trust me?”
“You married me for some deal or something. It’s not real.”
He grasps the front of my throat and turns me to face him, pressing me up against the door. Before I can say a word, his lips are on mine. I whimper into his mouth and get angry with myself for melting into him.
“There are things you still don’t know about me. Some I hope you never find out, but I’ve never lied to you. Ever.
“Did I have to get engaged? Yes. But I didn’t have to get married. I married you because I love you. I’m staying married to you because I love you,” he says against my mouth.
I look up at him and search his eyes. My heart still hurts. All the confidence I’ve been building feels false.
“Shawna, baby, this is real. I really love you.”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why do you love me? It doesn’t make sen—”
He cuts my words off with a hard kiss. I lock my fingers in his hair and hold on tight as he devours me. There’s something different about this kiss.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have rushed things. I thought you were ready. I thought you saw what I saw,” he says and moves to kiss behind my ear.
As he kisses my neck and unfastens my jeans, I try not to make a sound. However, the moment he shoves his long fingers into my panties and pushes them into me, I lose the battle.
“Josh,” I cry out.
“You’re so gorgeous. I sit up at night watching you, wondering what I did to deserve you. You’re amazing. You stepped right in and helped me create a family for children who aren’t either of our blood, no questions.”
“Oh my God, Joshua,” I moan as I try to grab his wrist and slow the climax he’s creating.
“You look at me and see me, a man, not my scars, not my demons. You have always seen me. Even when the darkness tries to peek through.
“That’s it. Come for me. Stop fighting it, baby. Let me show you pleasure. All I want is to give you pleasure. If for no other reason than because it’s what you deserve.”
“Fuck,” I gasp as my legs tremble as I lift up on my toes and gush all over his fingers.
I place my forehead to his chest. “I need to think,” I whisper.
“You don’t need me. You don’t need anyone to prove you’re beautiful, intelligent, sexy as fuck, and worth loving. When you allow yourself to see it, you’ll understand why. You will never have to ask me or anyone else why.
“I love you, Shawn. I’m in love with you. I spent eight years waiting for you. That’s why I rushed to marry you. Not because my grandfather put a clock on my head. I did it all because I love you.”
“And if you didn’t find me here that night? If we hadn’t started dating. What would you have done?”
“I would have become a monster because there wasn’t anyone else for me.”
With that, he kisses me one last time before placing his fingers he pulls from my pants into his mouth. He locks gazes with me as he licks his fingers clean.
“This fight is over. Tonight, you’re sleeping in my bed.”
“But… what about Ven?” I whisper.
“I’ll take care of that. You and me, Shawn. Focus on you and me.”
Kelex
I’m sitting in bed with my back to the headboard as Shawna sits between my legs. I have my arms wrapped around her shoulders as I bury my face in her hair and inhale. It’s good to have her back in my arms.