Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 96586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 483(@200wpm)___ 386(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 483(@200wpm)___ 386(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
Merrick laughs at the lame joke.
“And online shopping for the number of things I need? Doesn’t work. That and my mother damn near put me over her knee for suggesting I purchase such major life items not in person.”
“Sounds like she’s old school.”
“When it comes to shopping? Yes. When it comes to stalking her new favorite authors like Samra Summers – who I still haven’t told her I see daily due to her kids being enrolled in my school – the woman is as new school as they come. She is addicted to getting text updates from those she follows.”
My mover warmly laughs again.
“Anyway, I’m gonna be gone until probably late tonight – having dinner with my family after shopping – , so I’m gonna go ahead and leave you with the cash now on the honor system you’ll split it in half with your roommate.”
He places one hand over his heart and holds up two fingers on the other. “Scout’s honor.”
There’s no stopping my head from sarcastically tilting. “I have a really hard time buying that you were a scout.”
“Fine,” he mischievously grins, “gear head’s honor.”
“That I believe.”
Another round of snickers slips loose prior to him poking once more. “Seriously, though? No furniture? What are you gonna sleep on?”
“An air mattress I’m borrowing from my brother-in-law.”
“Where’s all your other shit?” he bluntly inquires. “I mean obviously this isn’t the first place you’ve ever fucking lived. Last place catch on fire or some shit? Flood? Termites?”
“No.” Choosing my next words requires a deep breath to keep the craving for a crescent roll at bay. “I recently broke up with someone.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m not.” To my surprise, the statement feels empowering. Lengthens my spine. Kicks my chin a little higher. “I decided to let him keep everything that wasn’t mine instead of fighting and bickering over stuff we acquired together – so to speak. I mean I barely even kept some of the clothes I had while we were together. I figured a completely, fresh start would be best.”
“I know all about fresh starts.”
“Yeah?”
“Oh yeah.” There’s a short pause that’s proceeded by a quieter question. “With all due respect?”
I lift my eyebrows as an indication for him to continue.
“Whoever this dude is? He’s a fucking moron if he let you leave,” Merrick sweetly states. “You’re a helluva boss, so I can only imagine you were a helluva girlfriend, too. Like I’m pretty sure that shit transfers that direction.”
Now, if only that were true.
As time has passed, I’ve found myself wondering if maybe I didn’t try hard enough.
If I didn’t do my part to make things work or grow or change.
On the occasion, when my mind wanders off in the middle of watching Nights in Rodanthe for the umpteenth time, I wonder if I blame him for being distant so that I don’t have to take the responsibility of being distant myself.
For accepting less than I deserved for so long.
For not living by the golden rule of loving someone the way you want to be loved.
When I’m totally up front, ugly, look the dealer in the face even when I’m gonna lose honest with myself, I know our relationship being shitty wasn’t just his fault.
And while I can’t go back in time – no matter how hard I fucking wish I could some days – I know I can do better in the future.
The present.
Right fucking now by taking control of my life and making even longer overdue changes.
Such as this cute spring dress I would’ve never spent eighty dollars on while dating Xander. Partially because I didn’t love explaining splurge purchases to him and partially because we didn’t go enough casual places for this to be a good fit in comparison to some of my other attire.
Guess I could’ve worn it around Katherine?
Then again, we don’t tend to go many casual places together anymore, either.
Rather than dump more information than the young guy probably needs on him, I simply shake my head, open my wristlet, and pull out the envelope of cash. “You, Merrick McCoy,” the object as well as the keys to the truck are handed to him, “are too charming for your own good.”
He winks at the same time he shoves the cash into his backpack. “It’s a McCoy thing. We all are.”
“Ohmygod, there’s more than one of you?”
“Three more.” His grin expands devilishly wide. “All guys. I just happen to be the youngest.”
“The baby brother.”
“The irresistible brother.”
It’s my turn to giggle while pulling out my car key.
“Charming runs in our DNA, but I definitely got the largest fucking dose.”
“I don’t doubt it.”
He gives me another impish smirk that’s attached to a one shoulder shrug.
“Stay out of trouble, Merrick.”
“You mean here or in general?”
“Here.” Additional giggles are followed by me backing up towards where my car is parked across the street. “You’ve got the keys to truck to unlock it. You can just leave it on the kitchen counter when you’re done. Boxes are all labeled where to go. If you aren’t sure, just leave them in the living room, and I’ll deal with them later. Once you and your roommate are done for the day, just turn the bottom lock on the front door, and that’ll lock up everything. I still haven’t gone through setting up the alarm codes and what not but having the front gate security guy has me feeling okay about that for the moment.”