Total pages in book: 75
Estimated words: 71915 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71915 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
“I’ve asked myself the same over the years. But maybe the truth is that we weren’t meant to be. We had other problems in our marriage too, so maybe the cheating was a sign that we weren’t going to work. And I decided we’d had enough. That’s a point that can’t be lost here. So if there’s anyone you should direct your anger at, it shouldn’t be Remy.”
“I certainly can’t be mad at you,” Bailey said. “Dad is the one who…hurt you. Hurt us.”
“Then you shouldn’t be mad at Remy either. He was only trying to protect me.”
I heard a muffled sob, so she must’ve pulled him into a hug. I leaned heavily against the wall, trying to get my own emotions under control.
“I think you’re more like me than I ever imagined,” Mom said. “You love big, with your whole heart. But you still shouldn’t accept crumbs from people.”
I swiped at the tears streaming down my face. Why the fuck was I crying?
“But listen, I’m not sad anymore. I have a full life, and I’ll always be grateful that your father and I produced two amazing kids.”
“Why can’t I stop being sad?”
“Maybe because you haven’t given yourself permission to let go.” Fuck, our mom was incredible. “Life isn’t fair, but we still have to move forward and find our own happiness.”
Later that night, I slept fitfully, wanting to text Alex so many things but deciding to leave him alone. He’d set a boundary, and I wanted to respect that.
But most of all, I couldn’t stop thinking about what Mom said to Bailey.
Was I only offering Alex crumbs? Didn’t he want more? Deserve more? And was I brave enough to give it to him?
In the morning, the three of us had breakfast, and then Mom went upstairs to shower. I glanced at Bailey, who was brooding over his cereal bowl. “Gotta work tonight, so I need to head back to campus. You wanna ride back with me?”
He narrowed his eyes, the resistance to me still present despite his heartfelt talk with Mom. Guess old habits were hard to break. “No thanks. I’ll figure out a ride on my own.”
“This is seriously how it’s going to be between us?” I gripped the handle of my coffee mug. “We can’t even be in the same vehicle together?”
“Yeah, that’s how it’s gonna be.”
“Such bullshit,” I muttered as I rinsed my cup in the sink. “I’m leaving in thirty minutes in case you change your mind. And don’t worry, I have no desire to even talk to you.”
I went up to my room to gather my stuff, checking my phone again for the hundredth time, but there was no message from Alex. What did I expect?
After I said my goodbyes to Mom, I walked out to find Bailey waiting by the car.
His cheeks were red as he muttered, “Does the offer still stand?”
“Of course.” I held my breath as I slid behind the wheel, and Bailey got himself situated in the passenger seat.
On the road, the silence grew thick between us, and about halfway to the university, Bailey was still looking out the side window and avoiding eye contact with me. But his leg was jiggling, a clear sign he was gearing up for something, and I hoped it wasn’t a fight.
“So it’s true about Dad?”
I turned down the radio, making sure I heard him right. “I think you know the answer to that.”
He nodded. “Dad was, like, my hero, you know?”
I bit the inside of my cheek. “All heroes have flaws.”
“You certainly do,” he muttered.
I scoffed. “I’m no hero.”
“You sort of are.” Bailey finally, finally, looked at me. “You always did your own thing, and I thought it was so obnoxious, but maybe there’s something to it.”
My heart clenched. “Are you actually trying to give me a compliment?”
“Dunno. Maybe.”
I inhaled a deep breath, trying to get my thoughts in order because to say he was throwing me right now was an understatement. I was afraid to say the wrong thing, so I chose my words carefully. “Does this mean I have a chance of getting my brother back?”
“Can we…just see how it goes?”
“Good plan. There are years of buried feelings between us.”
The car grew quiet again, except for some annoying pop song on the radio.
“What do I do about Dad?”
“Bet he was shocked you canceled on him for a change.” I smirked, drawing the slightest smile from him. “Tell him how you feel. Get it out and stop letting it all fester inside you. I’m not sure how he’ll respond, but hopefully, he’ll own up to it, and you guys can move forward.”
“What about you?”
“I don’t need that from him like you do. We’ve never been close. I said my piece two years ago.”
He stared hard at me as if poking at all my vulnerabilities about our father. Yeah, sometimes I did care about how it’d all played out, but most of the time, I’d made peace with it.