Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 58051 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 290(@200wpm)___ 232(@250wpm)___ 194(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 58051 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 290(@200wpm)___ 232(@250wpm)___ 194(@300wpm)
“You won’t have to, I’ll show up wherever you are at twenty-one with a stack of cash and that’s a promise.” Mom kissed his cheek and they traipsed outside, presumably to start party planning.
I stood and grabbed a muffin before thinking better of it and grabbing an apple as well. Getting ready for the date with Derek and sleeping in this morning had put me behind on chores, and I needed as much energy as I could muster after only a few hours of sleep. Everest had already taken care of the animals, which left me with the vertical farming structures to start the day off. I filled several wooden crates with tomatoes, lettuce, herbs and peppers. It was a pretty impressive haul, and I knew the markets this weekend would be worth the hours of driving to increase my customer base.
As I made my way back to the house, an idea struck me. Okay an idea and an excuse to see Derek before a long and busy weekend. I grabbed a small basket and filled it with a little bit of everything, apples and onions, jalapeno and bell peppers, basil and lettuce. It wasn’t much, but it was a good pretense to get close to Derek and share the good news about the custody case. He really had been very helpful throughout the entire ordeal.
I grabbed the basket and decided to make the trip on foot to settle my racing heart. Racing, because as much as I tried to fight it, my feelings for Derek weren’t just real. They were intense and frightening, and as much as I wanted to shove them down deep and forget about them, I couldn’t. He’d proven himself to be a kind and gentle man, a sweet guy who pitched in when needed and had a wonderful knack for romance without being too over the top.
I like him. I more than like him. The thought came unbidden but no longer unwanted. If I could be truthful with anyone it had to be myself. I liked Derek and I wanted more than our fake relationship, except the only to get it would be to open my mouth and say the words. Out loud. To him.
That idea didn’t sit well with me but it was something to think about as I climbed the steps with my heart in my throat. If he was happy to see me then maybe I would see how he felt about continuing to see each other until the relationship ran its course. If he was annoyed, I would drop off the basket, tell him about Everest and get ready for the weekend markets.
Easy.
I raised my fist to knock on the wooden frame of the screen door when I heard a voice. It was unfamiliar but I knew based solely on his words that the man had to be Derek’s agent Brody.
“You’re free, man. Free and clear so you can dump the hot farm chick and get back to your real life.”
“My real life?” Derek’s question didn’t do anything to soothe the ache in my heart at his agent’s words. They were close, incredibly so, which meant he knew more of the truth of Derek’s real feelings than what he showed me and apparently I was someone he needed to be freed from.
“Yeah, you know your life filled with supermodels and socialites, princesses and expensive meals, late nights at the club and later nights at the studio. Thank farm girl, offer her some cash and come back to civilization.”
Civilization. Farm girl. Money. Those words hit me with the force of a Major League hitter and I stumbled back one step and then another. “Idiot. Fool.” I whispered as many insults to myself as I could get out, as many as I could stand to hear until I realized that once again I’d let Derek Gregory make a fool of me.
I thought he was different. Grown up and more mature now, beyond the need to hurt people simply because he could. I was wrong. Again. This time I didn’t have an adolescent crush to blame, I had my stupid, desperate heart. “No,” I shook my head because I didn’t deserve all the blame here. Yes, I should have kept my guard up around Derek because I knew who he was, at least I thought I did. But he bore a lot of the blame too, for purposely being incredibly charming and personable, for doing his level best to make me believe that he was different and better, for thinking that he was special and I was wrong about him.
This was always a fake relationship and I let myself forget that fact, sleeping with him and falling for him. We were both at fault and I could accept that.
Eventually.
I nodded at my new resolve and calmly set the basket on the porch before I scribbled a quick note on a York Farms tag. “Enjoy your freedom.” With tears in my eyes I ran back to the farm as fast as I could, eager to put as much distance between us as possible. I knew that in time my heart would heal from this most recent bout of idiocy, but right now I needed to get away and lick my wounds.