Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 71679 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 358(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71679 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 358(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
“Geez,” Darby mutters as I walk past her. “If I had known we were going for the stone-cold poker face look, I would have brought my shades too.”
We’re almost reaching the living room when Kitty catches up to us. “Poo pants,” she hisses at me.
She wraps an arm around both our shoulders, and since we’re almost side by side, she’s the link that holds us together. I can smell bubble gum, which is all Kitty, and gardenias, which is Darby. Flowers and something sweet. I like it. I don’t wear anything myself because it sets off my head, but I like it on her. It’s delicate and not too much. Not triggering anything.
“I can’t wait to hear you guys promise your lives and your bodies to each other—”
This time I don’t mess with Kitty’s hair again to silence her. I go straight for her mouth, clamping my hand over her much bigger yap. Gently. But she gets the message. Because I have something much better, which I’d like to say.
“If we were having a wedding supper, which we’re sure as hell not, but if we were, I think a feast of blood and puppies would be most fitting. What do you think, Darby?”
When I turn to look at her, I know it’s not just the dark sunglasses that have drained her face of all its color.
“Sick,” Kitty grunts. “What the heck is wrong with you? I know that’s an inside joke. It has to be an inside joke. But gross.” Before I can say anything, she wipes away her disgusted look and gives me the most hopeful eyes I’ve ever seen. She’s excited, damn it, and her sing-songy voice rings through the house when she proclaims, “Now, let’s go get marrrriiiieeedddddd!”
4
DARBY
He freaking knows.
That’s the thought I kept having the whole time when I should have been on my game, concentrating on those serious vows that bound me to another person for the rest of my life—aka a year or whatever, but instead, I kept thinking that Leon knew. To the tune of, ‘twas the minute before our wedding, and Lord Poo is in the house, and holy fuckle nutles, he knows. He knew about everything. Everything in those damn chats. That upset me, even though I knew they were being monitored. I never said anything bad about anyone as a rule because I just don’t do those things since it’s simply not nice, but he knew all along, and he said nothing, which is kind of creepy. He allowed it to go on and on and on for who knows how long. He was rubbing it in when he told me right before we went to get married—the smug bastard—but I didn’t miss the little tiny inflection of hurt in his tone.
Yeah. I’d be freaking wounded if people were saying half that crap about me too.
If he was trying to distract me from my wedding jitters, I guess he did the job. I barely got through the ceremony. He didn’t kiss me, which was something I was freaking out about the whole time. And not in a bad way either, which makes me totally pathetic. He grasped my hand and said I was shy and we could skip that part. The JP just seemed like he wanted to get the heck out of there because we were running so late, so it didn’t matter to him either way.
After signing everything to make it all legal, Leon and I had our first fight as a married couple.
I wanted to go to the cabin in the morning. Sunday to Sunday. And I wanted to drive. However, Leon made it known that he was calling the shots, and we’d be going tonight. In no uncertain terms. His sister gave him a hard time for being an arse again and making me upset when I was sacrificing a lot for him to stay, but he just rubbed my promotion in my face—and frick, I’m insecure about that too because I don’t even know if I can do the job for sure—and then we had grilled cheese sandwiches that Kitty made as a sort of peace offering. I didn’t want to eat mine, but I humored Leon’s sister because she’s awesome, and then I left.
Now, I’m sitting on the doorstep of my duplex, which is actually just a fancy word for a really skinny, tiny little place that is adjoined to another very skinny, tiny little place in a series of skinny, tiny little places that make up a whole string of skinny, tiny little places. I’m waiting for Leon to pick me up so we can go to my family cabin. As a couple. Kind of. Well, not really. Alright, not at all.
I’m just happy that I’m going. I’m looking forward to a week away—sand, lake water, fishing, the sun, the cabin that I love so much, all of it. It’s been way too long. I’m not nervous about bringing Leon along at all. Yeah, not one bit. My stomach is not at all tied in knots worse than the ones I had to brush out from my hair after taking down that updo earlier today. Note to self, and by self, I mean everyone out there: Don’t go to get your hair professionally done, people. They use way too much hairspray and way too many pins. It hurts while they’re doing it, it hurts wearing it up, and it freaking hurts the most when you have to deal with the ratty rat’s nest after.