Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 101254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
And then he’s all I see. His height, his potency, the way he fills up the room with his presence.
Everything falls around him, and he’s all that’s standing.
He is strength.
I turn away from my mother and fall into his arms.
…
Time passes in a blur, and the next thing I know, I’m lying in a bed.
It’s not a familiar bed.
“Mommy!” I cry out.
Someone comes to me, sits on the side of the bed. Strokes my forehead. “It’s okay, Tessa. You’re safe.”
That’s not Mommy’s voice.
I sit up. Ben Black is there. “Where am I?”
“I brought you to my house. I didn’t want you to be alone. Your mother and sister are here as well, in different guest rooms.”
“This isn’t your room?”
“Of course not. I’d never be so presumptuous.”
He looks down at me, and his face is so handsome and caring in the sunlight streaming in through the window. How much time has passed? I have no idea.
I feel so empty. So much emptier than any other time in my life. Even when I woke up in the hospital after what Garrett did to me. Even after remembering what happened at my first communion.
This is worse. A thousand times worse.
I wasn’t violated this time, but I lost so much more than what Garrett took from me.
What Garrett and the altar boy took from me, I can heal from. I can get back.
I can never get my da back.
“You need anything?” Ben asks.
“I should go to work.”
“It’s Sunday, Tessa.”
I shake my head to clear it. “Sunday? I don’t… It was late Saturday night when we flew from Jamaica.”
“Yes, and we arrived in the middle of the night, Sunday morning.”
“And we went to the hospital.”
“Yes.”
“And I was too late, Ben.” Tears fall from my eyes. “I was too late to see my da. I was too late to tell him how much I love him.”
Ben rubs circles into my back. “He knows, sweetheart.”
I jerk at the term of endearment. “Don’t call me that.”
“I won’t. I’m sorry.”
I wipe a tear with my finger. “I don’t mean it that way. It’s just…that’s what Garrett called me.”
“All right.” He pulls me into a hug against his hard, warm body. “How about if I just call you Tessa?”
“Of course Garrett called me Tessa, too. But it’s my name, and he won’t take that from me.” I sniffle. “And damn it, he won’t take sweetheart from me, either. So you know what? If you want to call me sweetheart, go ahead.”
“It’s all right.” He strokes my hair. “I don’t need to use that one. We’ll find one that works for both of us.”
“Do you think you’re ready to kiss me now?” I ask.
He lets go of me and rises, rubs his hands through his hair. He turns for a moment but then turns back toward me, meeting my gaze. “You know I’ve been ready to kiss you for a long time, Tessa. But now is not the right time.”
“I disagree. Now is the perfect time.”
He closes his eyes, almost as if in pain. “If you only knew what you do to me.”
I stare at him. At the anguished twist in his handsome face. “If it’s anything like what you’re doing to me right now, then I do know, Ben. Please. I need you. I need that kiss.”
He sits back on the bed. “A kiss from me is not a substitute for the loss of your father.”
God, more tears are coming. I choke them back. “I know it’s not. You really think that I think anything could make up for that?”
He pushes my hair back over my forehead. “God, you’re so beautiful.”
“Then kiss me. Please.”
“I want to. I want to so badly. But our first kiss, Tessa, isn’t going to be like this. It’s not going to be an escape from something. And it’s not going to be a substitute for something.”
“I’m not seeing it as any of those things.”
“Tessa, mere days ago, you jerked away at my touch.”
“Stop treating me like I’m some fragile glass figurine that will break if you touch it. That’s not what I need.”
He shakes his head. “You’re not fragile. You’re strong, Tessa. So very strong.”
“Not strong enough.” I gulp. “I need that kiss, Ben. I can’t even describe how much I need it.”
He cups my cheek. “I’ll hold you. I’ll bring you breakfast in bed. I’ll draw you a warm bath.”
“Or a cold plunge?”
“Or a cold plunge. Whatever you need. But I can’t kiss you yet, Tessa.”
“Why not?”
His gaze darkens. “Because if I kiss you, I won’t want to stop with a kiss. I’ll want to do things you may not be ready for.”
“Maybe I am ready.”
He comes near me then, grips my shoulders. “Are you ready for everything, Tessa? Because once I kiss those lips, I’m going to want to rip your clothes off, suck on your gorgeous tits, suck all the juice out of your pussy, and then I’m going to fuck you hard. Hard and fast and raw. Because that’s how much I want you.”