Total pages in book: 155
Estimated words: 146417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 732(@200wpm)___ 586(@250wpm)___ 488(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 146417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 732(@200wpm)___ 586(@250wpm)___ 488(@300wpm)
She’d sat and held Ariel’s baby while she slept, and it had reminded her so much of how she’d felt holding Roman.
She wanted another baby. She shouldn’t. She was too old, right? Her life wasn’t exactly settled.
“She is. Luckily she takes after her mom,” he said wistfully. His gaze hardened. “Are you going to the club with me tomorrow?”
“Yes.”
“Then there’s no reason to stay away from me tonight. Come to my bedroom.”
She hesitated.
He stared for a moment and then took a step back. “All right. I’ll see you in the morning.”
This was what had been bubbling under his surface. He’d had a day and he needed sex. He needed the control that came with his kind of sex. He needed her to submit to him and let him know she trusted him.
She might have been able to turn him away if he’d simply needed it from any woman, but he needed her. Only her. He’d been faithful even when he’d had no idea where she was or what she was doing.
They had a horrible past, but through it all this desperate need had always been between them.
Because she needed him, too.
At least now she knew how long she could hold out.
She crossed the distance between them and let her hands find his chest, glorying in the warmth of his skin. “I don’t want to be alone tonight either. I’m sorry. I’m nervous. It’s been a long time for me.”
His fingers sank into her hair. “Exactly the same time for me. Except you had a nice man who touched you and caressed you and brought you to orgasm a couple of days ago.”
He was staring at her like she was the most beautiful thing in the world, and she started to relax. It would be good. Sex between them had always been good, and she needed the release. She could hold herself apart. She could get what she needed and not give too much up.
“It wasn’t enough.” Those few moments in Sicily hadn’t even been close to enough. “It was good, but I wanted more.”
His fingers tightened, pulling lightly at her scalp. “I can give you more. Do you remember the rules?”
She liked the rules. The rules reminded her that they were different now. They weren’t the same dumb kids who’d fallen into bed and never wanted to get out. “Yes. I obey you for as long as I like, and I can stop you at any moment.”
It was true. She was in control, but what the exchange did was give Beck permission to put everything on the table. He didn’t have to hesitate to ask for what he wanted because they’d agreed to talk about all of it.
The kids they’d been certainly hadn’t done that.
“Yes, but let’s emphasize the ‘you obey me’ part and just know the rest of it is there if you need it.” He stopped short of putting his mouth on hers. “You might need it. I feel restless today.”
She felt certain it wasn’t only today. “I’ll let you know if it’s too much. But seriously, Beck, I hadn’t even kissed anyone until I kissed you a couple of days ago. I don’t know...I’ve had a baby since you saw me last. I’ve changed.”
Her body had scars she didn’t have before, and he was still the gorgeous man she’d dreamed of at night.
She was older, a little heavier.
He tugged on her hair. “You’re still the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever known. You still make me crazy just thinking about getting my hands on you. I want you to walk into that room and take your clothes off for me because I’m going to think you’re sexy as hell. I want to look at you. I want to study you and memorize you all over again. I want to touch and kiss and lick every inch of you, and when I’m done I want to fuck you until I forget we were ever apart.”
It would be dangerous to forget, but she wanted everything else he’d promised. She especially wanted to feel sexy again. Her skin was already starting to heat, to tingle wherever he touched her. “Yes.”
“And then tomorrow night we’re going to drop Roman off with my friend Kai and his wife, and we’re going to a club where we’ll check everything at the door. All that will matter for four hours is that we are Dom and sub. We’ll spend the whole time indulging in everything we can’t all week long.”
Sex. Intimacy. Each other.
It scared the hell out of her, but she couldn’t tell him no. She’d agreed to this deal. It wasn’t fair to back out.
She might be out of practice when it came to the spy stuff, but damn, she was up to date on self-deception.
He finally brought his lips to hers and brushed them in the sweetest kiss. It was over altogether too soon, and he stepped back, releasing her. “Go to my bedroom and take off your clothes.”