Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 90075 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 450(@200wpm)___ 360(@250wpm)___ 300(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 90075 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 450(@200wpm)___ 360(@250wpm)___ 300(@300wpm)
I wished I’d never gone to Spectacle of Secrets.
Wished I’d never confessed to Hunter how much I wanted someone to take away my power.
I would give anything to forget the joy I’d felt at being dominated. To never know what the act of being subservient did to me.
It wasn’t because I needed violence to get off.
It wasn’t because I’d read the books and fantasised about the lifestyle.
It was as simple as I’d told Nick.
As profound as finally learning the truth about who I truly was.
I wanted him to rule me because for those short few hours in the big top—for those wonderful moments where two men told me what to do, what to think, and how to obey, I’d been free.
Free from the pressure.
Free from letting my parents down.
Free from my endless expectations of myself.
In Nick’s arms, I’d found peace.
Peace I’d never known before.
And now, all I felt was torment.
Chapter Thirteen
“DID I SAY YOU COULD CRY?” HUNTER demanded, dragging the thick leather of a crop over my bottom lip.
I shook my head, dropping my chin as I squirmed in the cuffs trapping my wrists. “No, Sir.”
“Did I hurt you, little witch?”
“No, Sir.”
“Did he hurt you?”
I flinched.
Hunter ducked before me and tipped my chin up with the crop. “Did Nick hurt you, my darling?”
I nodded. “Yes, Sir.”
“I’ll kill him.” Hunter wrung the crop as if it was Nick’s neck. “Your tears are meant to flow because you’re in ecstasy, not heartbreak.”
I cried harder. “I’m the opposite of ecstasy.”
Tugging me onto his lap, his jeans brushed against my nakedness as he pressed a kiss to my temple. “Tell me how to stop your pain.”
“Make him love me.”
He groaned. “No one has that power, little witch. Even you with your magic over us.”
“Then erase him from my mind.”
“I would if I could, but I can’t.” Cupping my cheek, he ran his thumb through my tears. “The only thing you can do is consume his mind in return. I told you before...if you want him, you’re going to have to break him.” He kissed me softly. “Don’t let him break you instead—”
I gasped as I shot upright.
The dream dissipated like wispy smoke.
My head ached from my drinking session, stealing some of my wooziness and dumping me firmly back into reality.
The TV still flickered silently.
I hadn’t even noticed I’d fallen asleep.
Shit, what time is it?
Am I late for work?
I was never late.
The hotel clock glowed a neon pink, revealing the time was two in the morning.
Oh, thank goodness.
No way did I have the strength to return to the lab in my current state.
Falling back against my pillow, I let my mind skip back to the night I’d spent with Hunter. What had we been doing at two a.m.? Which man was inside me then? Was it Hunter or Nicholas? What was Hunter doing right now? Was he inside another woman? Sharing her with another Dom? Worshipping her until she felt like a dirty, desirable queen?
Faint jealousy curled through me. The feeling was nothing as vicious as what I’d felt at the thought of people flirting with Nick at the lab, but it was there. Pulsing in my alcohol-laced blood, itching me to call him.
Call him?
I sucked on my bottom lip.
How on earth would I call him?
And why?
I’d accepted that I’d never see Hunter again. He had his life; I had mine.
But if Nick doesn’t want you...perhaps Hunter could give you peace?
The peace I’d only just discovered and now desperately craved. The freedom that came at the end of a lashing whip, tongue, and stroke.
Clicking on the bedside light, I reached for my phone before I could stop myself.
If he was still close by, I could travel to the town he was in and ask him to erase Nick from my mind, once and for all.
If I fell into his spell, just the two of us, perhaps he could help me move on.
Bringing up a search page, I typed in Spectacle of Secrets Contact Us.
Immediately, the familiar purple and silver colours of his company appeared. The website was scant and purposely vague with just a picture of the big top, a flashing R18, and the latest park address where they were pitched.
Damn.
He was at least five hours away.
Having sex with him tonight was out of the question, but...would he speak to me?
Would hearing him help heal all these wounds, old and new inside me?
With alcohol bolstering me, I clicked on the cellphone number listed at the bottom of the website.
It rang and rang.
Too long.
With every ring, I felt a little more stupid.
A lot more needy and miserable.
God, what are you doing?
Hang up.
The call connected, and Giselle’s chirpy voice came down the line. “Spectacle of Secrets. How can I help?”
Shit, now you’ve done it.
Trembling, I whispered as if people in the hotel would hear me. “Giselle?”
“Yes. Who’s this?”