Total pages in book: 106
Estimated words: 104329 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 522(@200wpm)___ 417(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104329 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 522(@200wpm)___ 417(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
“Have I done something I wasn’t supposed to?” Raven asked.
“No, of course not.”
“Missed something?”
“No, Raven. I missed you, okay? You’re … different is all. I guess hanging out with Carlos will do that to you.”
Just thinking about Carlos made her smile. With his bruises and sore body, she had thought he’d be in too much pain to want her, but last night, he had insisted on making love to her body with his mouth alone, and he had blown her mind. His tongue was magical.
“I like him. He’s a good guy.”
“You do know he’s … mafia still?” Abriana asked. “You’re never going to change that.”
“I know I’m not. I have no intention of changing him. I like him.”
“Only like?” Abriana asked.
Raven kept a smile on her lips. She wasn’t going to voice her feelings aloud. It seemed so wrong to do so.
Abriana’s past put her in the mafia-hating category.
Raven didn’t care that Carlos was mafia. He, to a certain extent, knew what her life was about. She didn’t know if she could have it both ways yet. The club and Carlos. She didn’t want to give up either.
There was a knock at the door, and Abriana excused herself to answer the door.
Seconds later, she came back with Ava, and Raven tensed up. This was the first time she’d seen the other woman in nearly two months.
“I’ll go and make us some coffee.”
Raven’s first instinct was to make excuses, but with Bella fast asleep in her lap, there was nowhere for her to run. She had a feeling Abriana was to blame for this. The other woman had used her daughter to keep her here.
Abriana had known Raven adored Bella, and she knew that the little girl, for some reason, didn’t have a problem with falling asleep in her lap.
“Hey, Raven,” Ava said.
Panic started to well up inside her. She didn’t know if she should look at Ava or keep her gaze averted.
“I know that something is going on here,” Ava said. “And I want it to stop.”
Raven looked up. “Nothing is going on.”
“You’ve been avoiding me. Not just now, but you’ve been avoiding me for months.”
“It’s … it’s not that.”
“Raven, I forgave you,” Ava said. “You … took a beating for me.”
“And you have nightmares because of me.”
Ava shook her head. “No, I don’t. I have nightmares because…”
Raven didn’t know what to say as she looked at Ava.
“I don’t know if I’d be able to do what you did,” Ava said. “In my dreams, you’re hurting. He’s beating on you, and he doesn’t stop. It’s up to me to make him stop, and I never do.”
“Ava, it’s not your place to protect me.”
“Someone has to,” Ava said. “After everything you’ve been through.”
Raven stared at Ava as Abriana entered the room. “Everything I’ve been through?”
The two women shared a look.
“I … I was with Smokey when you dialed him. The call never went off. I ended the call when I heard the club come to your rescue,” Ava said. “I … heard it all.”
“And you told her,” Raven said.
This was her secret. She hadn’t wanted anyone to know. It was all in the past.
“Raven, we’re on your side,” Ava said. “I had no idea what you went through.”
“It doesn’t change what happened,” Raven said. “It doesn’t change what I did to you, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness.”
“No, you deserve so much more than that. Do you not realize how strong and amazing you are?”
“Since your judgment call got my woman hurt. Think hard, Raven. If you hadn’t sent her off with a prospect that wasn’t even one of ours, my wife wouldn’t have lost our first child. She wouldn’t have had a concussion, and she wouldn’t wake up screaming some nights, terrified.”
“One mistake that anyone could have made.”
“Yeah, but it was you who made it. No one else.”
“And you still bought a house near a town with one? Are you fucking stupid?”
“Then why are you still here? You’re a club brother as far as I’m concerned, and that means I can beat the shit out of your ass.”
“When they go to bed, you’re mine…”
“You’re not good for anything. The only use you have is your pussy, and once they’d used that, you’ll be nothing.”
Like a broken record, Raven heard the accusations from the past. From the club. All her failings rolled into one.
You’re disgusting.
A piece of shit.
You’re not good for anything.
How can you even sit in the same room as these women? They’re better than you.
You’re scum.
“Raven, are you okay?” Abriana asked.
“I have to … I need to go. I completely forgot that I have a date with Carlos.” She got to her feet, and even as she hated to do it, she slowly placed Bella in the chair. The little girl curled up.
“You can’t go to him,” Ava said.
Raven turned to look at both women. Their hands were clenched, and they both looked panicked.