Total pages in book: 48
Estimated words: 47287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 236(@200wpm)___ 189(@250wpm)___ 158(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 47287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 236(@200wpm)___ 189(@250wpm)___ 158(@300wpm)
"You know, he’s never gonna stop," she said without turning around.
"Stop what?" River asked.
They didn’t have to ask who she meant. He was always their father.
"You know. Being how he is. To you. To all of us."
"I don’t like him," they confessed.
When Marina talked to them, it was a treat. They always tried to keep the conversation going as long as possible. Usually that wasn’t very long. River could never figure out what they said wrong to make her silence, though.
Marina snorted, smoke blowing from her nostrils like a bull.
"Yeah, no shit. No one likes him."
"Larry likes him," River said.
After all, why would he go hunting with their father if he didn’t like him.
"Larry," Marina declared, "is a piece of shit."
"Oh."
She stabbed her cigarette out on the bottom of her boot and put it in her pocket. "You shouldn’t listen to him," she said, stepping out onto the icy edge of the pond. "Whatever he says—whatever—you don’t listen. Understand?"
River did not understand. You had to listen to your parents, didn’t you?
Marina took another step.
"I’ll get in trouble."
"You have to be careful," Marina said. Behind her back, River crept closer. "You can’t count on the ice to hold you. The edges might be solid, but the middle can still give way."
"How can you tell?"
"You know, getting in trouble with someone who’s wrong isn’t the same thing as being wrong yourself."
River tried to make a connection between the ice and their father and being wrong, but couldn’t see how the pieces went together.
Marina crouched and knocked on the ice as if someone might answer. Might open a door for her beneath it and welcome her to another world.
She sipped from her flask and lit another cigarette. When she turned around River saw tears glistening in her eyes.
"Get a rock. The heaviest you can find. If you can throw that out on the ice and it doesn’t crack, it’s probably safe."
Something was wrong, but River didn’t know what it was. And when they didn’t know what to do, they did what they were told. They found a rock, the heaviest they could lift, and brought it to the edge of the pond.
"Go ahead. Throw it."
River threw the rock. It didn’t go far; only about as far as Marina was out on the ice. It thudded with a muffled crrch.
Marina let out a breath, then started to laugh.
"Guess it’s safe," she said, voice strange and tight. "Come on out."
River stepped carefully onto the gleaming surface. Beneath the treads of their snow boots, the ridges and whorls of the ice felt like scar tissue, a texture you could read like history.
Marina grabbed them by the jacket and pulled them close. She slung her arm around their shoulders.
"Sorry you were born into this shit family," she’d said, her words rolling together into a sustained melody. "Get out any way you can."
"River?"
Cassidy had a hand on their shoulder and was peering at them intently.
River surfaced.
"Are you okay? What happened? You feeling all right? Can I do something?"
Snow seeped through the knees of the jeans River had chosen so carefully for their date.
They looked up at the night sky. Stars winked in the velvet darkness, high above the trees and the ice and the man who was crouching next to them, eyes full of empathy.
CHAPTER 15
Cassidy
Something was wrong. Cassidy had enjoyed River’s concern until he realized it was panic. River had stared blankly at the ice, eyes gone far away.
"Hey," Cassidy said softly. "Let’s go back to the truck. It’s pretty cold out here."
"You wanted to skate," they said flatly.
"I’m good. How about we have some snacks?"
River nodded and dragged themself up.
"Sorry," they said miserably. "I was thinking about my sister."
Cassidy slid into the driver’s seat and turned the key one click to get some heat. His mind was racing, gathering all the bits of information he’d just witnessed and attempting to piece them together.
"We should have just gone to dinner," River said flatly.
Cassidy opened the bag of kettle corn and held it out to them. They took a handful, ate it, and only then seemed to realize what they’d consumed.
"Damn. That stuff’s good."
Cassidy smiled, relief calming his nervous system.
"Yeah, it’s addictive," he agreed. "When I was little, every Christmas my aunt and uncle would send us these huge tubs of popcorn. You know, the kind divided into three sections, with cheddar popcorn, buttered popcorn, and caramel corn? I would eat the caramel corn and the buttered popcorn together to get the sweet and savory in one bite. My brother and sister thought it was gross, but it’s basically kettle corn."
"Family is so weird," River said, staring out the window. "Who decided that the way we’re supposed to prove we love each other is by sending one another huge tubs of corn?"
"I don’t know. Probably catalogs."
"Catalogs were like online shopping before online shopping existed, huh?" River said.