Total pages in book: 30
Estimated words: 29018 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 145(@200wpm)___ 116(@250wpm)___ 97(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 29018 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 145(@200wpm)___ 116(@250wpm)___ 97(@300wpm)
“Jedd,” I cautiously call out creeping into the space further, “you here?”
The lack of response pushes me deeper into the territory.
Sends my eyes scanning for clues that he’s still here.
That he didn’t just enjoy a short stint in the warmth and being well fed only to bail at the last minute.
His neatly made bed doesn’t strike a nerve; however, the absence of his guitar case – the single most important thing to him anymore – sends an uncomfortable shiver down my spine.
This isn’t happening. He didn’t fuck us over like this. Himself over, did he?
I slowly wander over from the front door to the nearby bathroom to once more search for proof he hasn’t left. The fact that everything looks freshly cleaned and restocked continues to send mixed messages to my spiraling mind.
Perhaps the maid just came in when he left for a moment.
But if he left for just a few, where did he fucking go?
Especially knowing he has to get to work.
Calling in sick after one week at a new job isn’t the best idea.
We talked about that.
We talked about that so much as well as other shit like responsibilities and expectations and appropriate conduct at your new place of business. I spent hours and days helping mold and shape him the best I could.
I sacrificed time with my kids.
My wife.
Friends.
I gave to him the same dedication Jaye once gave to me.
Minus the drooling over him shirtless thing. I’m a happily fucking married man, and even if I wasn’t, Jedd’s not my type. Ha. You smiled. At least I’ve made someone do that this Christmas Eve. God knows it wasn’t my family. Even Charles started glaring when I said I had to swing by the office for just a few. His human lie detector shit was going off I’m sure but again. Can’t say anything. Not…not…yet.
All of a sudden, my phone begins to vibrate in my jean pocket prompting me to retrieve it. The picture of Jaye cuddled up reading to our girls simultaneously swells and shatters my heart, making it difficult to answer in a steady voice. “Hey, sweetheart.”
“Hi, Dad!” Henz loudly chimes from the other end.
“Hi, Dad!” Rainne quickly echoes.
Their joyful tones have me stumbling backwards to brace myself against the bathroom door frame. “Hey, angels.”
“Home soon?” Henz is first to investigate. “You gotta help Pop Pop setup the reinbeer feeder!”
“Reindeer,” her sister fusses on a heavy huff.
“We could add a section for beer,” Charles croaks in the background.
“Charles!” his wife instantly chastises.
“I’m just saying try to be open-minded, Mags. Tis the season to be drinking.”
“Dad, you know that’s not how the saying goes.”
“Sure, it is,” he states between loud laughs. “Fa-la-la…la-la-la-liquor.”
“Stop it,” Maggie demands on good natured giggles.
“Dad,” Rainne speaks up over them, pitch warm. Hopeful. “You won’t miss making magical reindeer food, right?” There’s a shuffling as if she’s picked up the phone to put her face closer to it. “That’s like your favorite part!”
It’s only my favorite part because of her. Because it’s her favorite thing to do together every year. Personally? I could go to bed not covered in gold glitter like a Mardi Gras Magic Mike stripper.
“I’m um…headed home now,” I state in the least defeated volume I can muster up.
“How many minutes?” Henz eagerly interrogates. “One? Five? Fifty eleven?”
“That’s not a real number,” Rainne sassily scolds.
“Uh-huh, Pop Pop uses it all the time when waiting for cookies!”
“Charles!”
“How about we hang up that phone before you two little sprinkles get Pop Pop in more trouble?” Charles laughs again loudly, voice getting loud as he gets closer. “I don’t wanna end up with coal instead of cookies in my stocking.”
“Good idea,” says my wife less that sweetly. “Tell your dad goodbye.”
She’s still…unhappy with me. And it shows. The chaste kisses. The smaller smiles. The fact she’s not talking to me about books at all. And fuck me, does that shit hurt more than you can imagine. I fucking wish I could just tell her what’s been going on, yet I didn’t wanna get those hopes up for this very reason. I can take her grumpy with me for a few days – don’t get me wrong, the shit is hard – but seeing her disappointed is a whole other book on the shelf I actually avoid picking up as much as possible. It’s heavy. And super fucking hard to put back down.
Genuine joy attempts to be heard in my response, “See everyone soon. Love you.”
Ending the call is proceeded by abandoning the empty room; however, the hope that I can still give my family good news versus the shitastic type that seems upon me is what leads to me asking housekeeping about Jedd. Their lack of knowledge regarding his whereabouts successfully adds to the building dread but hearing they recently did clean his room as well as the front desk clarify that he hasn’t officially checked out at this time manages to have it sink to the pit of my stomach slower.