Total pages in book: 210
Estimated words: 200837 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1004(@200wpm)___ 803(@250wpm)___ 669(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 200837 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1004(@200wpm)___ 803(@250wpm)___ 669(@300wpm)
At least I thought we were.
This display today tells me something different. I am nothing to her. She might call me niece, but in her mind, I am nothing but a servant. I am not anything special. I am not some prophesized Chosen One who will save the day.
I am a whore, apparently. Well, I guess it’s better to know where I stand than to go on thinking the people I care for care back.
And actually, Auntie’s betrayal cancels out my own betrayal this afternoon with Finn Scott. He might lust after me, but at least he doesn’t look at me with disgust the way she is right now.
What did I do, though? What triggered this?
It must’ve been Finn. It’s the only possible explanation. I quickly run the meeting back through my head, but from Auntie’s point of view. I picture Finn and me at his table, leaning into each other like we were telling secrets. Like we were… intimate.
OK. I guess, if I were the one in charge of a political coup and my highest-placed spy was looking cozy with the enemy, I might jump to conclusions. I might even become paranoid.
But this meeting with Finn today was mostly innocent.
Wasn’t it?
I mean, I hadn’t planned on betraying the Rebellion. Not at all. Everything I did last night was to get more information. At least, it was until he started touching me. Then… well. I don’t have time to parse all those feelings right here in the moment, but it hadn’t even entered my mind to switch sides, that’s for sure.
“Jasina!”
I jump. “Yes.”
“Report!”
“Right.” I take a deep breath and talk. “I got in, but I got caught. That’s why we looked familiar back there.”
“You”—she scoffs, blinking her eyes at me like she’s astounded by my idiocy—“were caught?”
“Yes.” I’m already on thin ice with her, now is not the time to lie. So I spill everything. “He was drunk, he mistook me for Clara for some reason, and then he… he… he kissed me.”
That’s as far as I’m willing to go. I will not tell her about how he had his fingers between my legs. And I’m definitely not telling her how it made me feel.
“So he came to his senses at the table today?”
“His senses?” I scowl. “What the hell does that mean?”
“You are no Clara, Jasina. She was the perfect Spark Maiden.” She smiles and places the back of her hand along my still-stinging cheek in a caring gesture that is at odds with the words spilling out of her mouth and the look of pity in her eyes. “You will never be a Spark Maiden, my dear. You haven’t got the breeding.”
My whole face screws up in confusion. “Well, you were a Maiden, and I’m your niece. So I’m failing to see—”
“You’re a mongrel, Jasina. I was born in the Tower District. You are nothing but”—she crinkles her nose here. Like I smell bad—“a lowly, third-generation, down-city slut.”
Wow. For the second time in five minutes.
“What is the plan going forward?”
Well, now that I think about it, I actually do have a plan going forward—it’s to sabotage this entire Rebellion. Fuck these people. Who the hell does she think she is that she can just insult me like this and expect me to play good little spy for her? No. No way. I’m done.
But of course, I don’t say any of that to evil Auntie Bell. Instead, I start a new ploy. I’m starting to like that word. “I think I can get inside that Looking Glass room tonight. I think he’s interested in me. He told me to come back. That’s what we were talking about at the table.”
That’s not actually how it went. But when I offered to come back he certainly didn’t object.
Auntie smiles here. A very wicked smile. “He wants to fuck you.”
I do not cringe, I simply shrug. “Maybe?”
“There’s no ‘maybe.’ You’re a whore. He wants to use you and throw you away. You will let him do this, Jasina. But if he throws you away too soon, my dear, you will be discarded by us as well. I expect a report tomorrow about the Looking Glass room. Do you understand?”
I nod enthusiastically. Because I feel like this meeting is coming to an end and I desperately need to get the hell out of here so I can sort through everything that just happened. “I understand. I will have details tomorrow. Important details that will further our goal of toppling the tower god. I promise, Auntie.”
I turn, so ready to retreat, but I am yanked back by my hair. So hard, I nearly fall backward on my ass. I stifle the scream and the insults—not to mention the tears—and cower in front of Auntie as I turn.
Just bow to her, Jasina. Just grovel. It’s what she wants. And if you give her what she wants, she will let you go.