Total pages in book: 210
Estimated words: 200837 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1004(@200wpm)___ 803(@250wpm)___ 669(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 200837 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1004(@200wpm)___ 803(@250wpm)___ 669(@300wpm)
“We were… I dunno. Eight, I think.”
I smile because eight was a good year. My mother was not only still alive, but not even sick.
“And we went down-city, remember?”
I smile bigger. Because while I haven’t thought about that day in almost twenty years and we used to sneak down-city a couple times a week on a regular basis, I know exactly which one he is referring to. “I remember. We were looking for kittens.”
His smile grows wide, lighting up his whole face. “Because you wanted a kitten for your birthday and that was not a present you got.”
“So you were going to get it for me.”
“Lord Relic.”
I almost snort when I picture the grizzled, old, mangy cat we took back up-city that evening. There were no kittens anywhere, which was probably the whole reason I didn’t get one in the first place. But there was Lord Relic, the mouser from the Shipping District who had been around for two decades, if the rumors were true.
“It took us all day to convince his mangy ass we were friendly.”
“And then we stuffed him into that flimsy cage and tried to take him home.”
Finn is laughing now. “But he was so pissed off, he clawed his way through the canes and escaped.”
I’m laughing too. “We were so sure that he would rather stay with us on the boat, we didn’t even mind.”
“Until he jumped into the canal, threw us a big ‘ol ‘fuck you’ look over his shoulder, and then never looked back.”
Finn and I both chuckle. It’s a good memory. I was so shocked. It never even crossed my mind that the mangy mouser from Shipping liked his life and would not prefer to come live up-city with me where he would be dressed up for tea parties and pampered like a prince.
“It just goes to show you,” I say, “that happiness is relative.”
He sighs, but stays silent. Maybe thinking about tomorrow and how I won’t be here.
I’m still angry—mostly at myself and not him—but I don’t want him to remember me angry. I want him to think about our adventures as children, and our first kiss, and this day too—because I do have to admit, the sex was good.
I guess, if I have to die tonight at the hands of an angry god inside a tower, my last day could be worse.
So I come up with my own good memory for him to hold on to. “My good time was when we were fourteen. I was just starting to get over the death of my mother and I asked you to be my date for the Pledge Gala in my second year.”
His face goes sad, which throws me for a moment. Because it was such a great night for me. So great that it never even occurred to me that he didn’t have a good time.
“Sorry—did you not have fun?”
His eyes go wide with surprise. “What?”
“It’s just… your immediate response came across as… sad.”
He exhales, but looks me in the eyes. “I had forgotten about that night. But no, it wasn’t sad. It was… heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean… it was the perfect night. It was our first real kiss. It was the first time we went up to the wall after hours.”
“That was the part I liked. The first kiss was amazing, of course. Because it was with you and it was everything. But that midnight walk on the wall, under the stars and looking out at the sand was everything. Especially the way you held my hand.” I shrug. “I felt like a princess that night in my gala dress. And you were all dressed up too. Like my prince. And it was gonna last forever, Finn. That’s how I felt that night. Why did it break your heart?”
He hesitates for a moment.
“What? Tell me.”
I can tell he doesn’t want to, but after a breath for courage, he does. “That night, after I took you home, after that first kiss outside your door, I left and I was a hundred percent certain that I was gonna lose you.”
“Why?”
“Because you were so perfect, and so beautiful, and… there was no way that the god would pass you up over someone second best. I was sure you’d be Chosen, and I was absolutely sure you’d be number one. So I went home, crying. And my father, he kept asking me what was wrong.”
“And you told him.”
Finn nods. “I told him.”
“And I was Chosen. But I wasn’t number one, because your father would never break your heart like that. I was number nine, so it wasn’t so obvious. And now look at me. It’s my turn to walk into that tower. It’s like… that stupid god knew we cheated him. And this is his revenge.”
Finn doesn’t say anything. He knows I’m right. He knows this is true.