Total pages in book: 31
Estimated words: 29205 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 146(@200wpm)___ 117(@250wpm)___ 97(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 29205 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 146(@200wpm)___ 117(@250wpm)___ 97(@300wpm)
“Yeah, I’m fine,” she says, but she doesn’t look at me.
“What’s going on? I thought you quit smoking. I thought you quit getting high.”
She taps the pack against her hip. “I did, I just do it when I’m anxious.”
“Anxious? Why are you anxious? Did something happen?”
She laughs, but it’s the kind of laugh where nothing is really funny. “It’s nothing, I promise. I’ve got to go. Not much time left on my break.” She pushes past me before I can ask her anything else. Something is clearly bothering her, but she’s not going to let me ask what. At least not here. Again I hope that when we’re at home and things are calmer she’ll talk to me. Back on the dance floor, I get back into the cage, lifted back into the air for my second stint as a star.
6
The next few weeks feel like falling. Falling into a rhythm, into happiness, into a whole new world.
Club Deep is my reality now, every night like entering a dream. I never thought that I would have a job that I would love this much, and the people at the club love me. I get tip spotlights regularly, and every few days Julian tips me some insane amount that makes the special effects of the club go wild and whips the crowd into a frenzy. Cosette likes it too, I think. She gets tip spotlights from time to time, but not the way I do. When we were little, we dreamed of being professional dancers together. Granted, we never thought that it would happen like this, but still.
And Julian…Julian has been amazing, both in and out of the club. We never quite made it out on that date—we haven’t seemed to have the time, though we’ve had meals in his office together, just talking. And of course, fucking. I’ve learned that I really love the feeling of that carpet on my bare skin…among other things. I can’t get enough of his body, and I’m slowly finding out that I can’t get enough of his mind either. He’s caring and kind, and one of the most intelligent people I’ve ever met. Plus, there’s the benefit that he does things to my body that I’ve never felt, a world of pleasure that I didn’t think could exist. He keeps telling me that I’m an exhibitionist, that I like being watched. And maybe he’s right. We’re certainly being less cautious.
Unfortunately, things at home aren’t nearly as good as they are at the club. Cosette is avoiding me. She stays in her room, claiming she’s tired and she needs to sleep, but the music coming from her room indicates otherwise. I tried to ask her what’s wrong, why she’s smoking and getting high, but she dodges the question, saying she’s fine when she’s obviously not. The rejection hurts. I feel like it’s been weeks since we really talked and I miss my best friend. I’m watching her in a destructive spiral and she won’t let me help her. The only time I manage to forget about it and let go is when I’m with Julian. For those delicious minutes and hours he makes me feel like there’s nothing wrong with the world—like I’m not losing the one person who’s the most important to me.
Tonight as I come into the club for my shift, he meets me at the base of the stairs. I’m starting later than I usually do, and the club is already filled people. Julian sweeps me into the shadows, pressing me against the wall and kissing me. It’s so easy to kiss him, like breathing doesn’t matter anymore because his lips feel so damn good. We saw each other last night, he fucked me in parking lot, against my car because I needed to go home and he wasn’t letting me leave until we both came. We haven’t had sex every day since we met, but it’s close to that, and so much more.
He’s told me about his friends and business partners, how they created Club Deep to be a safe place for anyone who wanted it. How they almost lost the club after one of their friends stole money from them, and how he hasn’t had a relationship in a long time because his last one left him jaded and feeling like there was no one for him. I’ve told him about my family, how my parents are recently gone, and since then it’s been a struggle to just survive. I’ve told him how I’ve wanted to dance since childhood, always moving to whatever music was playing. So now when he kisses me it’s more than just pleasure, it’s a deep understanding, a knowing that I’ve never felt with anyone else. It’s hard for me to believe that it’s only been a month.