Total pages in book: 84
Estimated words: 81150 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 406(@200wpm)___ 325(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81150 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 406(@200wpm)___ 325(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
Deacon watched his in-laws for a moment, the two of them watching him. Grady could see the emotion in his eyes, in the set of his jaw and the curl of his shoulders. He looked down at Grady and Moose…and smiled. And then he turned to Eugene and Frances. “If you got something to ask, ask it.”
Grady was equal parts proud of Deacon and worried, because again, he didn’t ever want to push him, didn’t want to come between him and his family, or Patricia’s family. Christ, these people were a connection to the woman he’d loved more than anyone in the world. At the same time, goddamned, was he a stand-up man.
“You and that man…the things we’re hearing…some of them at church of all places! They’re saying you’re…but it don’t make no sense, Deacon.” There was a rough edge to Eugene’s voice that rubbed Grady wrong, that hurt him, that reminded him of his own parents.
“It’s true,” Deacon replied.
Grady pushed to his feet then, risked letting go of Moose because he sure as shit wasn’t leaving Deacon alone in this unless he asked. He stood beside Deke, shoulder to shoulder, letting him know that whatever happened, Grady was there for him, while at the same time quietly pleading with the people in front of him. Don’t hurt him. Don’t walk away from him. It will break his heart. And if they did, that would confirm they likely would have done the same to Nathan.
“I can’t explain it other than it’s the way I feel. I’m sorry you had to find out this way. I planned to tell you, but I didn’t, and now we’re here.”
“I don’t understand,” Frances said.
“I know, and I’m sorry about that, but really, does it matter? What’s to understand? People fall for each other every day. Sometimes it lasts, sometimes it doesn’t, but it happens, and we did. I fell for Grady, just like the two of you did with each other.”
Christ, Grady wasn’t sure there was a braver, better person in the whole damn world than the one standing beside him in that moment. He didn’t feel worthy to be there, to deserve that kind of loyalty.
“Have you always been…? What about Patricia?” Frances asked.
“What about her?” There was restrained anger in Deacon’s voice. “I loved her. You know I did. She was my entire world. I still love her, but she’s gone, and…I’m so tired of being alone.” The pain in Deacon’s voice nearly broke him. Grady’s fingers twitched with the need to reach for him, to hold him the way he knew Deacon liked, to tell him it would be okay.
“So that’s what this is about? Not being alone?” Eugene spat.
“No. I didn’t mean that.” Deacon shook his head as if unsure what to say.
“Don’t you think it’s weird that this man shows up out of the blue, gets close to you, and now suddenly you’re changing who the hell you are?” Eugene turned, his eyes finding Grady. “What are you playing at?”
“Nothing. I know it’s a shock, but what we have will never change what he had with Patricia. I would never hurt him. I care about him more than I have anyone else, and—”
“It ain’t right,” Eugene cut him off. “I don’t know what to do with this.”
Jesus, this could not be fucking happening. After losing his family, then Nathan, and Deke losing Patricia, Grady was now creating a rift between Deacon and his in-laws.
“Mr. Liles, I know this comes as a surprise to you. I can understand you feeling a little off-balance, but Deacon is the same man. He’s the best one I know, and it would kill me to come between the three of you.”
“What would Patricia think?” Eugene asked. “Did you love my daughter, or was she some kind of beard for you?”
Grady saw Deacon flinch, saw the pain explode in his eyes. “Don’t do that. Don’t ever use my wife’s memory against me. You know how much I loved her! But I can’t be alone forever. I’m happy for the first time in three years. That’s all Patricia would care about, and that’s all you should care about too. Who cares if he’s a man?”
“That’s not the way it’s supposed to be, Deacon,” Frances said, sounding so much like Grady’s own mother bile climbed up his throat. “We don’t understand how you could have loved Patricia if you’re a homosexual.”
“I’m not gay, and I don’t… I can’t do this with you. Not when you’re using Patricia against me like this. You know what she meant to me.”
“Do we?” Eugene asked. “We thought so, but this…a man suddenly swoops in and—”
“And makes me feel like I can breathe again. That’s what he’s done. It would be okay for me to move on if he was a woman?” When they didn’t answer, Deacon sighed. “We’re gonna go have our dinner now. If you change your mind, you know where to find me. If not, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t show up like this again.”