Total pages in book: 52
Estimated words: 47419 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 237(@200wpm)___ 190(@250wpm)___ 158(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 47419 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 237(@200wpm)___ 190(@250wpm)___ 158(@300wpm)
If I hated him before there are no words for what I felt when I finally saw the pattern. As if the physical abuse wasn’t enough, the things he said to break me down had done their job, and I felt like less than a shell of myself. Having people constantly reminding me that I was getting what I deserved doesn’t help.
It was his sisters who so callously said that to me. I thought that as women, they would have some empathy, but his mother refused to talk to me ever, and his sisters only hadn’t blocked me because they enjoyed knowing that I would see their updates on Rachel’s life and how it would make me feel.
So, it’s no surprise that when I called them pleading for help because of what their brother was doing, they laughed in my face and told me I was getting what I deserved and not to call them again. I think that’s the moment when I realized I had hit rock bottom.
As I stood in the mirror that night, something inside me broke. I let silent tears fall and burn the cuts on my face and my split lip as I told myself over and over again that I deserved better. That nothing I had done was deserving of this hell.
Doug was the one to blame. He’s the one who cheated on his wife, not me, so why should I be the one to suffer? They blame me; he blames me, but I refuse to continue blaming myself. So, I decided there and then that I was going to take my life into my own hands and rely only on myself.
I needed out of this marriage, but I’d be damned if I was going to support his whiskey habit on my dime. I have no doubt the slime would go after alimony since he hasn’t worked in a very long time, and I am the only breadwinner.
So, the answer was obvious. He needed to die. I knew from watching ID shows that I had to cover my ass if I didn’t want to get caught because I wasn’t about to give up one prison for another. I felt my first real excitement that night, to the point that I actually enjoyed sex that night.
I hit the ground running the next day, but first, I had to lay the groundwork. I needed a new email address and online identity that could not be traced back to me. For that, I visited the next town over for a few days, going to the library to use one of their computers to do the research I needed.
I then had to dive into the bowels of the dark web to get what I wanted, open a PO Box with a new name and the list goes on. I wasn’t doing anything suspicious in anyone’s eyes. I’d made up the story at the job about not feeling well and having to go for tests on my lunch break. Doug didn’t notice anything because he didn’t care.
My only issue was how I was going to get the thallium into his whisky. I’d gone with that particular poison because it was slow-acting according to dosage and could not be detected. It’s no longer sold in this country, but you can find what you need if you’re willing to pay the price.
Once the hard stuff was out of the way, I turned my attention to getting it into the bottle without being detected. I was going to add it to his food as well, but he drinks more than he eats, and I especially liked the idea of him drinking it while I was away at work, slowly killing himself. My hands are clean.
The problem about resealing the bottles was easily solved with a little research and a ten-dollar purchase from one of those low-end online stores that sell everything from sketchy home décor for two dollars a pop to; I’m sure, human organs. They’ve got to make money somewhere, and I’m sure it’s not hawking that trash they sell as clothes.
Then again, since I’d gained so much weight and could no longer afford my nifty suits, I’d taken to ordering clothes from those places, so I guess I shouldn’t knock it.
Anyway, once I got that little detail out of the way, I removed the six bottles of whiskey I’d bought and hidden in my trunk and sat in my car and the empty parking lot of a dry cleaner’s to add the thallium to the bottles before resealing them like new.
Once back at work behind my desk, I was able to breathe because everything had gone off without a hitch. I was so excited I could barely sit still in my seat. I spent the last half of the workday mapping out a plan for my future.