Total pages in book: 127
Estimated words: 123435 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 617(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 411(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 123435 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 617(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 411(@300wpm)
Those chiseled features soften. “How did I do that?”
“You taught me how to stand up for myself. How to be honest with the people around me. I used to be a real chickenshit. But you make me feel strong and—”
He kisses me.
It comes out of nowhere. Dare I say, reminiscent of the old Aaron days, but at least Tate’s tongue is still in his mouth. He presses his lips to mine in a soft caress before pulling back.
I run my fingertips over the stubble rising on his jaw. “You okay?”
“Just kiss me again,” he says, and our mouths collide. Now his tongue slides through my parted lips, bordering on desperate. His fingers are in my hair and he’s groaning against my lips. There’s an urgency there, a thick thread of emotion wrapping around the two of us, and I realize both our hearts are engaged.
I pull back and the words just slip out.
“I love you.”
His eyelids pop open. “What?”
“I know I said a lot of things before. That I didn’t want a relationship. This would end in September. There was no pressure. I know I said all those things. But something’s changed. I don’t know how, but it just has, and now I’m in love with you.” I gulp, staring at my hands. They’re trembling. “You told me to talk about my feelings. Those are my feelings. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
My gaze flies to his. “You do?”
“I do. I’ve known for a while. Just didn’t have the balls to tell you.”
“Wait, so I’m suddenly dropping feelings bombs and you’re holding them in? Is that what you’re saying? We’ve switched places?”
“Something like that.” With an indecipherable look, Tate strokes my cheek. Then he brings my face toward him, and his lips touch mine in an infinitely gentle kiss.
But this kiss …
It doesn’t feel right.
A drop of moisture splashes the tip of my nose and I look up in confusion. Tate’s blinking rapidly. He drags the side of his thumb over his eye.
“What’s going on?” I ask uneasily.
“I don’t want it to end either,” he confesses, emotion creasing his features.
Joy flickers through me. “Okay, good—”
“—but it has to,” he finishes, his voice a scant whisper.
My heart sinks like a stone to the pit of my stomach. “W-why?” I stammer.
“You asked how it went with my parents.” He lets out a breath. “They worked through the affair. Mom forgave him a long time ago. All these years of being disgustingly in love, it wasn’t fake. They are in love. They love each other a lot, in fact.”
“That’s good, no?”
“It’s great. And I understand my dad’s reasons for what he did. That’s not to say I condone his actions. He was wrong. He did a shitty thing and he hurt her. But she forgave him. Their marriage is rock solid.”
“This is all good, Tate …”
“Dad and I had a moment alone and talked about our own stuff, too. Worked through some shit. I’m going to sail to New Zealand.”
I nod, the dots suddenly connecting in my head. “I see. And you think it has to end with us because you’re leaving for three months—”
“No, that’s not it.”
I rub the bridge of my nose. I’m so confused. “I don’t get what’s happening right now.”
“I spoke to my mother alone too.”
“Okay …” None of this is making sense yet.
“She forgave him,” Tate reiterates, his voice breaking slightly, “but that doesn’t mean she needs to be reminded of it every single day.”
A sick sensation crawls into my stomach and wraps around my intestines. “And I’m a reminder of it,” I whisper.
He nods. Agony flashing in his eyes.
“We talked for a while. Mom never wanted to know who he had the affair with, but she knows now. She knows it’s your mother. She admitted it’ll be hard to see you if you and I were together, if we were a couple.”
I feel the tears coming. I briefly close my eyes, hoping to ward off the onslaught. I can’t even blame Gemma for this. That’s the worst part. I understand. Of course she doesn’t want this reminder. Every time her son brings his girlfriend home, she has to be reminded that her husband cheated on her? With the girlfriend’s mother?
“I can’t do that to my mom,” Tate says hoarsely. “I love you, Cass. I do. But I wouldn’t be able to live with myself knowing I was hurting my own mother. I can’t do that to her.”
His jaw is working. Throat squeezing as he swallows repeatedly. He looks so upset.
I reach for his hand, lacing our fingers together. “It’s okay. I understand.”
“I’m so sorry.” Sheer misery hangs from every word.
“You can’t bring home the girl whose mother almost destroyed their marriage. It’s going to be a dark cloud over our entire relationship going forward, especially if your mother can’t get past it. There’s no silver lining.” My bottom lip starts quivering. I bite hard on it. I don’t want to cry. “So I guess this is goodbye.”