Total pages in book: 127
Estimated words: 123435 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 617(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 411(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 123435 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 617(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 411(@300wpm)
He notes my skepticism and chuckles. “Do you really not see what you do to me?”
Despite myself, my gaze lowers to his groin. And yeah, there does appear to be some … swelling … happening beneath his sweatpants.
The evidence of his arousal, however, only triggers a gust of frustration.
“What the hell!” I burst out.
Confusion creases his forehead. “What?”
“What do you mean, what? You’re the king of mixed signals, Tate! Do you realize that?” I back away from him, aggravation rising inside me. “You can’t do this shit, okay? It fucking confuses me. And it’s fucking inconsiderate. And now look at how fucking much I’m swearing because that’s how fucking frustrated I am with you!”
He takes a step forward. “Cass—”
“No.” I whip up my hand to stop him from coming any closer. “You’re confusing. And insensitive! First you kiss me—and then you tell me you want to be platonic. Fine. So now we’re friends and suddenly you’re my wingman, and I feel like, okay, things are moving in a platonic direction—and then you jerk off in front of me! Seriously, Tate. What am I supposed to think here?”
“I know.” He releases an equally frustrated groan. He drags both hands though his hair, messing it up even more. “I’m sorry.”
“Yes, you should be! I don’t get it. If you’re attracted to me like you insist you are, then why wouldn’t you just agree to be my summer fling when I asked instead of feeding me a bunch of excuses and platitudes?”
His expression grows tortured. “I honestly thought it was the best idea at the time. I was worried I might hurt you if we got involved. That you might want something more. And I don’t have a great track record with relationships. I’m sort of just the hookup guy.”
“And I wanted a hookup! I literally approached the hookup guy for a hookup!” I realize I’m practically shouting at him and force myself to lower my voice.
“I know, but you said so yourself, you don’t have a lot of experience in this department. You’ve never even had sex before. I felt like I’d be taking advantage of your inexperience.”
I’m so horrifically embarrassed that my entire face is on fire. I wish I had a cold glass of water to hurl at my cheeks. “My virginity freaks you out this much?”
He hesitates. “I’m not freaked out, not really. It’s … the pressure, you know? Being your first puts a lot of pressure on me to make it good for you. To make it the best you’ve ever fucking had. Well, I suppose you wouldn’t know if it was the best, since you’ve never done it before, but you know what I mean.”
Kill me.
Kill me now.
This time, I all but collapse on the edge of the bed. I don’t even care what my stomach does. I bury my face in my hands and moan. “Please leave, Tate. I’ve had enough humiliation for one night.”
“Cassie.” I feel the mattress dip under the weight of him. “Come on, look at me.”
“No,” I mumble into my palms.
“Look at me.”
“No.”
“Don’t you want to know the silver lining here?”
“There is none. We finally found a situation without a hint of lining, silver or otherwise. It’s all black. Just big, black thunder-clouds.”
I twitch when I feel his thumb on the side of my jaw. He gently pries my face out of my hands and cups my chin, forcing me to look at him.
“Let me tell you the silver lining,” he says. Gruff and sincere.
“Can’t wait to hear it,” I grumble. And although he’s trying to impose eye contact on me, I keep my gaze downcast. Focusing it on his thumbnail.
“The silver lining is, if I hadn’t heard your mother calling you a bimbo and—hey, you’re right, it is fun to say. Bimbo.”
I laugh faintly and accidentally meet his eyes, which are twinkling.
“If she hadn’t said that shit, I wouldn’t be sitting here right now telling you how beautiful you are.”
Despite myself, my pulse speeds up. Because hearing those words spoken in his deep, earnest voice does something to me. Hits me in a different way. Aaron had called me beautiful the other night, but it hadn’t elicited this kind of response. Hadn’t made my heart flutter or my hands shake so wildly that I have to place them on my knees to keep them still.
“And if I hadn’t heard all that shit, I wouldn’t be saying: Cassie Soul, I would like to fling you.”
My jaw drops. “What? Oh no. No way. I don’t need a pity hookup.” I peel his fingers off my chin.
He captures my hand and brings it to his groin.
I give a sharp intake of breath at the feel of an unmistakable erection beneath my palm.
“There is zero pity involved here,” he says. “Not even a shred of it. Seriously. Feel how hard you make me. I want you so bad it hurts.”