Total pages in book: 235
Estimated words: 227851 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1139(@200wpm)___ 911(@250wpm)___ 760(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 227851 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1139(@200wpm)___ 911(@250wpm)___ 760(@300wpm)
“She’s not good.”
I look at my office door. “Is she in there?”
“Yes, she’s in there.”
“What have you said?”
“I’ve said you’re marrying Ava.”
“And what did she say?”
“Nothing. She cried.”
“Have you told her I know she used your phone to text Ava?”
“I haven’t said anything.” Except that I’m marrying Ava. He lightly pats my shoulder as he passes. “I’m around if you need me.”
“Thanks,” I say quietly as he wanders away, leaving me to fend for myself, putting his shades back into place.
I face the door.
Take in air.
Reach for the handle.
It’s times like these I miss the drink most. Pushing my way in, I find her at my desk leaning over a file, a tissue in her grasp. She looks up, blinks, and sniffs, pulling a smile from nowhere. The last time I was with her, she was thrashing me with her whip. The last time I saw her, I had succumbed to her for the second time in my life. And each time I have yielded to Sarah, whether it be to her body or her whip, the aftermath has been excruciating. She’s toxic. I’ve always known it, but when it was only me that she poisoned, it didn’t matter. I didn’t matter. I deserved everything, even if I knew deep down Sarah was in love with me. But now Sarah’s venom is affecting Ava. She’s trying to destroy our love. And I can’t have that.
I clear my throat and motion to my chair, making Sarah get up. She puts herself on the other side of my desk as I lower, avoiding her eyes. “How’s your back?” she asks, shocking me.
I lift stunned eyes to hers. “My back looks like I relented to your fucked-up fantasies and let you at me with your whip.”
She shrugs. “Better than getting drunk.”
I grit my teeth. How? How can she still sit there and be so vindictive after what she’s done? Because she’s Sarah. And it’s an act. “How’s your neck?” I retort, observing she’s opted for a high-necked halter-type bustier to cover the scattering of bruises left behind after Ava had her by the throat.
“I’ll live,” she muses, crossing one leg over the other.
“You sent Ava a message from John’s phone telling her to come here so she could see you thrashing me,” I say, wondering how the hell she ever thought she’d get away with it. And I also wonder if she even cares that she hasn’t. Does she think I’d stand for that level of betrayal? Because if she can do that, what else is she capable of?
“What?” she says, laughing. “Don’t be ridiculous.”
“Ridiculous?” I counter. “No, Sarah. Ridiculous is you thinking I could ever love you.”
She recoils.
“After everything you’ve done, you honestly still think I could love you?” I lean forward. “I’m marrying Ava. And you need to leave.” I get up, and her wide eyes lift with me.
“What?”
“Leave, Sarah. There’s nothing here for you. There never has been, because my heart has never been open to you.” I head for the door.
“Jesse, wait.” I feel her hand on my arm, and I roll my elbow back, getting her off me, my skin burning under her touch. “I didn’t do anything. You’re wrong.”
“And you lie?” I say on an angry whisper. “After everything, all the shit you’ve caused, the damage you’ve done, you don’t even fucking own it?”
“Don’t do this, Jesse, please.”
“This is all you, Sarah.” I wince, knowing that’s a stretch. I gave her the rope to hang herself. I gave her the opportunity to fuck me over. So this is on me too. Fuck. I pull the door open.
“She can’t make you happy!”
I swing around and stalk toward her, raging, and she backs up until she’s virtually lying on my desk. “She already fucking does!” I bellow. “My heart beats for that woman, Sarah. What the fuck don’t you understand about that?” I withdraw, heaving, as Sarah cowers on the desk. “Admit it,” I demand. “Admit what you’ve done, Sarah. Own your fucking truths.”
“Like you have?” she asks quietly. “How much is there for her still to know, Jesse?”
“Are you threatening me?”
“No,” she blurts. “No, I love you. But will Ava if she knows the extent of our darkness?”
“Ava knows everything she needs to know.”
“And when you fucked Freya and Nala in here?”
“She knows.” Not who, that doesn’t matter, but she knows.
Sarah can’t hide her shock. “You told her?”
“She knew because she knows me, Sarah. Like she also knows we”—I wave a finger between us—“fucked once.”
Her face is not a picture I want to remember. Hurt. Anger.
Realization.
“But she doesn’t know about Rosie and Rebecca?” she asks quietly. “Or Jake?”
I shake my head. “And she won’t. You’ve done enough damage, Sarah. Let me have this peace.”
Her face falls, and she looks at the carpet. “Please.”
“No. You can’t be in my life anymore. I don’t want you in my life anymore. I hate you, Sarah. I hate you with a vengeance because you tried to take the one woman I’ve ever loved away from me.” I turn and walk out, shutting the door behind me, nodding at John as I pass. He turns with me, flanking me. He say’s nothing, but he’s there. Always there by my side.