Total pages in book: 139
Estimated words: 129268 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 129268 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
My heart races and emotions swarm up my throat.
I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to admit how much pain it caused, how many memories resurfaced … I don’t want to think about it and make it all real again. I lived in happiness for years, avoiding the truth. It doesn’t have to be real. I don’t have to acknowledge it. Caleb’s wrong; it doesn’t matter.
“I don’t care.” I can barely give him my answer. It’s the same answer I gave him last time and the time before that. The answer I know will push him to punish me. He’ll take care of me after. And I want that. I crave it in a way that drives me to keep this going. I don’t know how to explain it. I want this over and over, because in the end, he’s going to make it better. He has to. He’s my mate.
Smack! I jump as the belt whips through the air and lands hard on my bare thighs, just below my ass. I breathe through clenched teeth, hissing at the pain. Tears cloud my vision. But I’m used to them. Just like I’m used to the pain.
“They called you broken and you don’t care?” My head is so dizzy, it takes me a moment to realize he’s waiting for an answer as he rubs the swollen, red marks. His cool touch soothes my heated skin. Caleb’s fingers are dangerously close to slipping between my legs. I’d rather he touch me there, but he’d rather whip me. Punish me for not admitting I’m damaged. Fuck him. He’s not getting that from me. He can beat me until I’m black and blue. Just like all the others. Just like Dom’s father. Burying my head into the sheets, I tell myself that’s not true. My head thrashes and the splinters of pain deepen. I know all I have to do is tell him it hurts, not the punishing blows, but the fact that I’m broken.
“You care, don’t you?” This question is spoken in a softened voice. Staring straight ahead, I don’t want to tell him I do, because then what? Is he going to make me face the past?
“No.” I brace myself, preparing for the blow that’s coming. Smack! The belt lands across my ass, making my blood rush violently in my ears.
“Why do you lie to me? Why do you lie to yourself?”
“I’m not lying!” Tears prick my eyes and I let them fall. Smack! My skin burns from the repeated strikes of the leather. I find myself pushing against the sweet sting. My pussy clenches in anticipation.
“Stop lying. Tell me how you feel.” His tone is tortured. I shake my head as tears fall down my face. Why am I lying again? I can make this stop. I can stop this by just admitting the truth. I shake my head harder. I don’t want it to be real.
“She called you broken. How does that make you feel?” I keep refusing to answer. My body trembles as he gently runs the leather across my tender ass. “Answer me!” He’s going to belt me again. But I don’t want it anymore. I don’t want this anymore. My skin is hot and sensitive, each smack bringing me closer to the edge of something else. That’s all I want. I want to fall off the edge.
“Caleb,” I plead with him.
He lowers his lips to my ear after kissing the crook of my neck and says, “Tell me, tell me.”
“Worthless. It makes me feel like a failure.” I sob, gasping for air as the pain of my admission flashes through me. It’s out. The words flew out of my mouth without my conscious consent. I’m so worthless. A wolf who can’t shift. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know if I can ever be fixed. “I’m useless. Like I shouldn’t be alive.” The belt falls to the floor with a loud thud and in an instant Caleb is on me, pulling me up and cradling me in his arms.
“You’re none of those things. You’re perfect.” The words rush out of him and then his lips devour mine. Everything ceases to exist.
I cling to him as he pulls me into his chest and rocks me. There’s a sweet sting of pain and pleasure as my ass settles against his thigh. “Look at me.” I stare into his silver eyes as he kisses my nose and rests his forehead on mine. He whispers, “You’re not broken.” My lips part to object. Of course I am. “You were made with perfection. Including your latency.” The word makes me flinch. He takes my chin in his hand with a firm grasp. My eyes are caught by his fierce gaze. “You are a latent wolf. And you are fucking perfect.” The sincerity and love are undeniable in his admission.