Total pages in book: 22
Estimated words: 19577 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 98(@200wpm)___ 78(@250wpm)___ 65(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 19577 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 98(@200wpm)___ 78(@250wpm)___ 65(@300wpm)
"I hope you know that I'm very fine and very happy," I retort. "Bodhrri is doing a wonderful job! He takes good care of me!"
"Good," Sinath says, pulling out his data pad. "I'll note that in my report. And if I don't see you between now and then, I'll return in a month to give things another check."
He nods at me and then turns and heads away, the setting sun glinting on his metallic-looking horns. I watch him get into his air-sled, and it takes a moment for me to realize I'm shaking with fear.
Bodhrri isn't safe here because he's an employee. They're looking for an excuse to get rid of him. Not out of malice, but out of concern for my safety. He could be gone in a flash. What if a neighbor decides she doesn't want a cat alien working in my fields? Would they get rid of him to please her?
I need to sit down.
Trembling, I make my way to the sofa and collapse. The happy little world we've been building feels as if it's crashing down around me. I don't want Bodhrri to leave. I don't want him to live in fear, either. I'd hate the thought of him worrying that one wrong move will get him sent back to a station, that his coughing will start again and his lungs will fill up. I want him to feel as safe and secure as I do.
But...how?
I take deep breaths, trying to still my panic. Sagging against the couch, I'm barely aware of my surroundings. My head is throbbing. I just need to talk to Bodhrri. See if we're on the same page with things. We've got to be able to figure this out between the two of us. Even if he doesn't want to be with me romantically, we can still be partners. We can raise our kids together.
Except he hasn't really brought up being a dad. Sure, he touches my belly and takes care of me, but he's careful not to mention the babies. Realizing that sets me in a whole new panic. What if he wants to head out the moment they're born? Find a new job? What if I'm the only one imagining us as a cozy family?
Is it too late to panic? Because I'm panicking.
"Payton?" Bodhrri calls from outside as I stare off into space. "Who was here? I saw a sled fly off."
"I'm inside," I call out, and try to get up from the sofa. My belly is so big that I'm not able to get to my feet, though. "I need help getting up!"
He laughs even as he opens the door and comes inside. The sound is so bright and full of sunshine that I immediately panic all over again and blurt the first thing that comes to mind. "What if we got married?"
"Right now?" Bodhrri gives me a confused look even as he extends his hand and stands over me. He helps me to my feet, his hands lingering as he rubs my shoulders. "I thought we were going to watch the stars?"
"Oh, no, I guess we can watch the stars," I fumble through the words, my thoughts racing. "But maybe we could get married tomorrow. Or the day after. Whatever you feel like?"
The big alien frowns down at me, cupping my cheek. "Are you well? You look fevered. You're breathing fast, too."
"I'm fine. I just...I might be freaking out a bit."
"You are not freaking in?" he teases, because he finds our strange sayings funny.
Normally I'd laugh. Normally I'd think it's adorable that he's trying to charmingly mock my slang. But I can't stop thinking about Custodian Sinath and how casually he offered to remove Bodhrri from the planet. All I have to do is wave a hand and he could be gone. "Bodhrri, a custodian was here."
His expression remains puzzled. "Did he say something distressing to you?"
"He said if I wasn't happy with you as my employee, he could make you leave."
Bodhrri nods, still not getting it. "And...?"
"That's bad!"
"For me, perhaps. But I am glad they have such rules in place. It reminds me that you are safe here no matter what." He brushes a lock of my hair back from my face. "I like that they look out for you."
"But who's looking out for you?"
His mouth tugs up on one side and he's quiet.
Well, fuck all that. I grab him by his collar and pull him down toward me. At least, that's what I intend to do. The reality is that I'm short, and I more or less just grab fistfuls of his tunic front. "Do you want to marry me? Yes or no?"
He doesn't answer.
I shake his tunic a little more. "It's not a hard question."
"My answer would be yes, except you are not asking me for the right reasons."