Total pages in book: 155
Estimated words: 147891 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 739(@200wpm)___ 592(@250wpm)___ 493(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 147891 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 739(@200wpm)___ 592(@250wpm)___ 493(@300wpm)
“Is that why Blackwater feuds with Ripple Hills?” I ask.
“No. There have been many feuds between us. There are battles and wars that go back centuries. It depended totally on the reigning monarchs. Magnus and Buckley were too arrogant and lazy to feud during their reign, so they were allies for over a century. But when I and Rami took over, we were enemies from the start. I could see Buckley all over Rami, and I despised him. He thought he could come to my territory and tell me what to do, steal my rubies, and make his demands. I shut that down, and if there was one thing spoiled Rami hated, it was being told no.”
“Yeah.” I roll my eyes. “I remember.”
He studies my face, a pained expression filling his eyes.
“What’s wrong?” I ask quickly.
He shifts beside me and exhales through parted lips. “When you said in Ripple Hills that I was killing people for no reason…” He trails off, his gaze dropping, and I feel a clench in my chest. “It’s never not for a reason, Willow. I do it before they can do anything to hurt me.”
“Oh, Caz. I’m so sorry I said that. I didn’t mean for my words to hurt you. I just didn’t understand any of it back then, but I do now. Trust me, I do.” I hold his eyes for as long as he’ll let me, and he sucks in a sharp breath, as if he finds relief in my understanding.
“As for me mum, well, she died when I was nineteen. I never got to see her again between the time I was taken and when she died…but I could have. At that age, I found out Magnus had been having one of his hired Mythics cast a spell over me. It was a shield of sorts, so that whatever I endured negatively would not be seen by The Council. I only found this out because the Mythic was so bloody drunk one night and angry at Magnus about something, that he told me everything. I was livid when I found out, so I left Blackwater and sought The Council, demanding to be out of his care. I told them all about what he was doing to me, about the fighting caves in Ripple Hills, and even let them see for themselves as they laid hands on me and filled their minds with my memories. And as I’ve told you before, harm to a child is one of the most punishable crimes. The Council decided to execute him once they found out, and when Magnus was given his sentence, he came to me, full of rage. Then he dragged me to the dungeons my mother had been kept in and had one of his men hang her.” Caz’s voice has changed. It’s thicker with equal parts agony and rage. His hand squeezes tighter around mine, not to the point of pain, but enough for me to feel just how much anguish this confession causes him.
“He killed my mother before he was executed. He did it to spite me. One last punch to the face and stab to the heart before it was his time.” He makes a strained noise. “I was so naïve and stupid then. I should’ve saved her first. I should’ve found her before going to The Council, but it’s because of me that she’s dead. I gave him that window of opportunity to kill before The Council came to end him.”
“Caz, no. No, you cannot blame yourself for that. You were just a kid. You had no idea—”
“I was a fucking idiot!” he counters, snatching his hand out of mine. He shoots off the bed and walks across the apartment, raking his fingers through his hair. “I would still have her if I’d just stuck it out, let Magnus die on his own. She didn’t deserve it—she didn’t deserve anything he did to her. He tortured her for years! He raped her and got her pregnant, and she didn’t have to keep me, but she did. She did, and after all that, I’m the one who got her killed.”
“It’s not your fault.” Hot tears creep to the corners of my eyes as I rush across the room to get to him. I clutch his face in my hands, and he tries jerking away, but I hold on to him. “You didn’t kill her, Caz. Magnus did. None of what you went through was ever your fault. You can’t possibly think that. I can’t believe you’ve spent all these years treating his burdens as your own.”
“All of it was my fault. Everything.” The lump in his throat bobs. “I’m broken beyond repair, Willow. Can’t you see that? Everything I touch either gets hurt or dies. Why do you think I rejected our Tether for so long? Why do you think I fought tooth and nail to resist you? Because I couldn’t afford anyone else I care about getting hurt. That’s why I told you to forget about me when Decius had me trapped. You deserve far better than to be with a man as terrible as me.”