Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 73774 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 369(@200wpm)___ 295(@250wpm)___ 246(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73774 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 369(@200wpm)___ 295(@250wpm)___ 246(@300wpm)
I’m still flying high from my climax, panting unabashedly, when Gage spreads my legs and thrusts into me. His fingers wrap around my throat, and his mouth slants across mine, his tongue delving past my parted lips. He fucks me with abandon, siphoning pleasure from my body… pleasure I freely give him. I want him to temporarily feel as good as I do, knowing that once this ends, we’ll both be right back where we were, in pain that shows no hope of letting up.
Gage shocks me by reaching between us and finding my clit once again. We both come long and hard, and between the high of the orgasms and the weed, I’m barely able to keep my eyes open long enough to see him pull out and grab a washcloth to clean me.
Still naked, we both fall asleep, our bodies wrapped up in one another, and for the first time since I lost my entire world, I sleep all night without a single dream or nightmare. And just like that, I’ve found my new escape, my own addiction.
And for the next couple of weeks, it works… until everything changes once again.
CHAPTER FIVE
GAGE
“Can I ask you a question?”
I glance over at Sadie, whose eyes were just closed but are now open. Over the past couple of months, I've learned that she has trouble sleeping. And since I know firsthand nothing can cure what we have—a broken heart—I do what I can to help. When she can’t fall asleep, she likes to ask questions. So I answer them, and at some point, while I’m talking, she’ll pass out. When she has nightmares, I’ll pull her into my side to try to comfort her. She’ll sigh against me as if my presence reminds her that wherever she was in her dream wasn’t real, and within seconds, she’ll pass back out. And when she wakes up early, she likes to take a warm bath. When she does this, I’ll hear her crying from inside the bathroom, so I give her space.
Tonight, it looks like questions it is.
“You know you can,” I tell her, pausing the TV and rolling onto my side to face her.
“Why don’t you ever work?”
Until now, her questions have been about bullshit topics like my favorite color and food or my favorite subject in school. She’s made it a point not to broach any topics that cause either of us to delve too deep. Until now…
But in her defense, this question isn’t really deep. And since I live in a three-bedroom apartment in one of the nicer areas of New York and have yet to leave her side in the two months we’ve been chilling together, it’s a valid question. But it’s one I’m not prepared to answer. Telling her I’m in a band might change our dynamic, something I don’t want to happen because… I like Sadie. More than that, I like her company. She doesn’t judge or question shit. She just rolls with the flow.
For years, I’ve felt like an outsider with my friends, especially as of late—with Camden and Braxton finding their significant others and settling down. Declan’s single, but he hangs out with Kendall—Camden’s sister and Declan’s love interest—a lot. And when we’re all together, they look at me like I’m a broken toy they need to fix.
But Sadie doesn’t see me like that. She knows I’m broken, but she accepts me the way I am. We could spend an entire day watching shows, laughing about nothing—something that’s rare for her—to laugh that is—or we can go an entire day without saying a word, and both days she’s content to just… be.
But I’m worried once she knows who I am, shit might change. She might not see me the same way as she does now, or she’ll ask more questions that will lead to topics I don’t want to touch.
When I don’t answer quickly enough, she says, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep,” and fuck if that doesn’t make me like her that much more.
“You’re not,” I say, reaching out without thought and pushing a few strands of her dark red hair behind her ear that have fallen out of her messy bun. “I’m taking some time off.” Not a lie since the band is taking a little break after our tour, and Camden and Layla just had a baby. “I have some money saved up, so I’m living off that until I figure out what’s next.” Also, not a lie.
Of course, she takes the answer at face value, nodding in understanding. “I’ve been thinking about the future,” she says, shocking the hell out of me. While she loves to ask questions, she never usually talks about herself. “I got my degree in English and was working as an editor when I got pregnant with…” She swallows thickly. “When I got pregnant with Collin. Because Vincent made more than enough money, I decided to be a stay-at-home mom. But I’m thinking now, that… I have…” Tears fill her eyes, and she gets so choked up she’s unable to finish her sentence. I pull her into my arms and hold her tight as she cries softly into my chest.