Total pages in book: 65
Estimated words: 60418 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 242(@250wpm)___ 201(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60418 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 302(@200wpm)___ 242(@250wpm)___ 201(@300wpm)
“Yeah, it happens a lot. As you know.”
“What were you thinking about?”
“Going back to school.”
“Oh, yeah?”
He said that a little too enthusiastically, so I told him, “Don’t make a big deal out of this. I’m only considering it.”
“What brought it to mind?”
“I spent some time with my friends Josh and Darwin today. They’re both in college, and they’re so excited about what they’re studying. It made me feel like I was missing out…but I don’t know. I’m not like them.”
“In what way?”
“They’re both so passionate about their interests. Josh is on his way to becoming an incredible filmmaker, and Darwin is a genius when it comes to science. They just light up when they talk about this stuff. Then there’s me. I’m older than both of them and still have no idea what I want to do with my life.”
“If you did decide to go to college, you’d take all kinds of classes your first two years,” he said. “Something could click with you.”
“But what if I’m too dumb to do the work? You know what I was like in high school. I barely graduated.”
“That wasn’t because you were dumb, Seth.”
“Then what was it?”
Eden leaned back and wiped his forehead as he told me, “You put all your time and energy into football. I know it was really important to both you and your dad that you ended up with a scholarship, and when that didn’t happen you just sort of gave up. I remember you cutting class a lot during your senior year, which is why you barely graduated.”
“Yeah. I guess I did give up.” I shifted a bit, and after a moment, I asked, “Why’d you end up choosing law enforcement? I vaguely remember you majoring in something else when you started college, but I can’t recall what it was.”
“I started out as a business major, but I was only doing that because it was what my parents wanted. The summer before my junior year, I finally told them I had no interest in taking over the restaurant empire they were building, and then I totally switched gears and changed my major to criminal justice.”
“What made you want to become a police officer?”
“That’s a long story.”
I turned to look at his profile. “I’d like to hear it, if you feel like telling me.”
“Okay.” After a pause, he asked, “Do you remember my BMW?” I shook my head. “My parents gave it to me for my high school graduation. It was used, or ‘pre-owned’ according to the guy at the dealership, but it was really nice. So here I was, this eighteen-year-old Black kid with a BMW, and I started to get pulled over all the time. Like, more than once a week, because I didn’t fit the stereotype of someone who’d be driving a car like that. It was so bad that I sold it after four months and bought my truck.”
“That’s awful!”
“It was. Anyway, later on when I realized I didn’t want to study business and started considering other career options, I thought about what had happened to me. I had this idea that if I became a police officer, maybe I could change things from the inside. It wasn’t the only reason I decided on that job. Law and order had always held a certain appeal, and it seemed like a good fit overall. But that’s what was in the back of my mind.”
I asked, “Do you feel like you’ve made a difference?”
“Not like I wanted to, even after ten years. Meanwhile, the job’s taken a toll on me. I deal with high-stress situations every single day, and sometimes it’s just incredibly depressing.”
That answer surprised me, since he was usually so stoic. I asked, “Why do you stick with it, Eden?”
“For one thing, I made a commitment. Also, I have no idea what I’d do for work if I left this job. Then there’s the fact that I have over ten years under my belt. I was able to bring my seniority with me when I transferred into this department, and I’m building toward my retirement.”
“But you can’t stay at that job for another thirty years, until you’re retirement-age,” I told him, “not if it’s taking a toll on you.”
“I don’t want to. But what’s Plan B?”
“You’d figure it out.”
“I guess so.”
“You know, in a lot of ways you and I are in the same boat. Neither of us knows what we want to do long-term, so maybe we both should be thinking about our next steps.”
Eden was the type of man who had to mull something over for ages before actually making a change. He murmured, “Yeah, maybe,” as he got up and stretched his hamstrings. Then he asked, “Are you ready to head home?”
I got up too, and as we walked the three blocks to our house, I asked, “So, what are you up to tonight?”