Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 56786 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 284(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56786 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 284(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
“We need to talk,” she said.
“I don’t feel like talking,” Lucien said tonelessly.
Vagrippa fixed him with an unimpressed stare. “You will put an end to it. Immediately.”
Lucien stared at her blankly, and finally, felt a twinge of concern. Surely she must have been talking about something else, not his relationship with Aksel. Surely she didn’t know?
But what little hope he had disappeared when she spoke again. “Aksel has enough trouble being accepted in society as it is. I didn’t think you so thoughtless. So senseless and selfish.”
Lucien swallowed. “Vagrippa—”
The glare she pinned him with made him feel fourteen all over again.
“You ungrateful, selfish boy,” she hissed. “We accepted you into our family when you had nothing, when even your pack turned their back on you. We gave you the protection of our name and our home, and that’s what you repay us with? By seducing my youngest son?” Her face scrunched in disgust. “Don’t you have any shame? I don’t want to imagine when this sordid relationship even started—”
“There was nothing sordid between us while Aksel was young!” Lucien said furiously. “How can you think that?”
“He is still young! You’re too old for him. He’s an alpha who is just entering his prime years, while you’re entering your middle age.”
That wasn’t true, strictly speaking. He was just thirty-five. By Eilan standards, he was still relatively young. Omegas weren’t considered middle-aged until they hit their fifties.
Not that it mattered. He might as well be fifty. His body was ruined.
As if reading his thoughts, Vagrippa sneered. “You’re very attractive now, but what about in twenty, thirty years? Aksel will be still in his prime, he will look as he does now, but you will not. You will look like me.”
Lucien’s stomach churned. “You’re still beautiful,” he said faintly, but Vagrippa did have a point. Alphas aged slower than omegas and betas. Well, to be fair, Dainiri omegas aged slower than betas, but still. Vagrippa’s point was valid.
“You know you have no future together,” she said, her expression hard. “You know it as well as I do. It isn’t even the age difference that is the main problem. Given your history of heavy suppressants usage for decades and the miscarriage in your past, you’re likely infertile. The scandal aside, you’re not suited to be a mate for a young alpha like my son. You will only ruin his life—socially and personally.”
Something painful lodged into his throat.
Lucien looked at her, unable to speak. It was like Vagrippa had plucked the thoughts from his mind.
And she was right. She was right about everything. Even the enormous scandal aside, he wasn’t suited for Aksel in the long term. Aksel deserved better than a ruined, defective—and most likely barren—omega. They had no future together.
His eyes burning, Lucien turned away, not wanting this woman to see him fall apart.
“I understand,” he said, with as much dignity as he could muster. “You don’t have to worry that I don’t understand my place. I don’t have hopes of—of being Aksel’s mate. I know I’m not nearly good enough.”
Vagrippa sighed. “I’m glad we understand each other. I was concerned that you...” She trailed off. “I’m not a heartless monster, Lucien,” she said at last, her voice stiff but not unkind. “I’ve never approved of your closeness to my son—frankly, I was scared of it—but I understand that you were lonely. I do believe that you genuinely care for him. That’s why I believe that you’ll do the right thing and not ruin his life.”
Lucien would have preferred harsh, cruel words. Somehow, this was worse. She wasn’t being vindictive or evil. She just wanted to protect her son. As would he—if he were capable of having one.
“I understand,” he repeated, like a broken doll.
“And I hope you understand that Aksel shouldn’t find out about this conversation. My son... he can be rather volatile and stubborn.”
“I understand,” he said woodenly.
He allowed himself to cry only when the door closed after her.
He didn’t cry for himself. He cried for the pure, clueless boy he’d once been, the boy who believed in fairytale endings, in love and true mates. The boy who wanted a huge, loving family.
The boy who’d believed in happily ever after.
That boy was now truly dead.
***
Vagrippa was right about one thing: Aksel wouldn’t accept his decision to end it if Lucien told him about his conversation with his mother. Aksel was a force of nature, unmovable and hard to argue with. He didn’t take people’s interference well.
So Lucien had to make it look like it was his idea. He had to be as cruel as possible, to make Aksel angry enough to keep his distance. Because Lucien knew himself, knew how weak for him he was. He didn’t trust himself to stay away if Aksel was close enough and receptive to him.
The problem with that plan was, Aksel knew him too well to buy his sudden cruelty. Lucien wasn’t sure he could pull it off. He wasn’t sure he was capable of it. Everything in him rebelled against the idea of rejecting and being cruel to his alpha.