Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 100750 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100750 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
TWENTY-NINE
GRAYSON
As soon as the REMOVE SEAT BELT light came on, Grayson was out of his seat and heading toward the bathroom.
He closed the door, slid the lock into place, and then broke down. The tears he’d been holding ever since he’d met Gemma and Lynnea came rushing forward tenfold. He could no longer stop them and was thankful for the roar of the airplane’s engines for drowning out his gut-wrenching sobs.
From the moment he’d laid eyes on the girls, he knew they were the reason for the constant ache in his chest. Rafe loved those girls beyond measure, and that love had stayed with his heart, and now Grayson was suffering because of it.
He glanced at himself in the cloudy mirror. Tears streamed down his cheeks. Some created a trail over his jaw and trickled down his neck, while some went straight to his shirt, wetting the fabric.
Grayson felt foolish and heartbroken. Two emotions he had trouble dealing with when mixed together. He shouldn’t feel this way about two tiny humans he didn’t know, or barely knew, for that matter. Yet when he sat there, enjoying his tea, he felt like he’d known them their entire lives. He loved them. Long before he’d even known they existed. That was the only way he could explain how he felt. They were a part of him, and he had to find a way to stay in their lives.
A knock sounded.
“One minute,” he said as he cleared his throat. Grayson stared at himself, hoping every answer he sought would magically appear in the mirror. Nothing was there. Except for a man with red-rimmed eyes, a running nose, and flushed cheeks. There would be no hiding this from Pearce, who’d undoubtedly have questions or give him some type of look that would border on disgust.
Pearce had gone with him for moral support. Had done everything Grayson asked of him, but it was clear he didn’t approve. No one could understand how Grayson felt. Waking up every day, knowing something was wrong but not being able to pinpoint what that something was until now. Now he knew, but knowing didn’t make things better for him. Not with the distance between him and the girls. And while Pearce had cautioned Grayson about seeing his ex, Nadia wasn’t who Grayson wanted in his life; it was Gemma and Lynnea. Their presence made him feel whole. Complete. They were the ache he felt.
Grayson apologized when he came out of the bathroom. He made his way back to the row he shared with Pearce, thankful it was just the two of them and not the dreaded middle seat situation. He sat down and kept his eyes trained on the flight attendants as they served drinks.
“You okay?” Pearce asked.
Grayson nodded and bit his lips to keep his emotions in check.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
He shook his head. After dinner the night before, they’d gone back to the hotel and hadn’t discussed their visit with Nadia, Reuben, and the girls. Doing so was the last thing Grayson wanted. He’d told Pearce he was tired and crawled into bed. Instead of sleeping, he’d stared at the ceiling, recounting the encounter. He’d hated leaving but knew they’d already overstayed their intrusion.
Grayson was thankful they were on an airplane and not driving. Their voices would have to be elevated to have a full conversation, and anything he had to say, he wouldn’t want others to hear. He didn’t care what people said; it was a natural reaction to eavesdropping. Not a day went by when he didn’t listen to what others talked about. He knew more about the people on his daily trains and in his office than he cared to.
The flight from Boston to DC was quick. They’d spent more time waiting in the airport for their flight than actually flying. Once the plane landed, they were off and through the terminal as if their asses were on fire. Grayson wanted to get home to Reid. He needed to see her, hold her, and confess. Lying to her and withholding his true intentions of taking the guys’ weekend weighed heavily on his conscience. He’d made a promise to himself when he pursued her to always be honest. It was the easiest thing he could do with her.
Grayson and Pearce took the subway together until they needed to switch lines. Pearce hugged his friend, patted him on the back, and told him to call if he needed anything. He wouldn’t call. Pearce might be his best friend, but Grayson sensed he couldn’t grasp the magnitude of how Grayson felt. He didn’t blame him at all, especially when he couldn’t fully understand things himself.
When he arrived at the apartment complex, he opted for the stairs. He took each flight slowly, delaying the inevitable. Reid would be ecstatic to see him, but she’d notice right away that something wasn’t right. She’d instantly think he was sick, or something had happened to his heart. She’d be right, but for the wrong reasons. As Grayson approached their door, he knew he’d tell her everything.