Total pages in book: 111
Estimated words: 104448 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 522(@200wpm)___ 418(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104448 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 522(@200wpm)___ 418(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
I’d been overwhelmed with anxiety at the prospect of seeing Dev again, concern that Katie had been misguided in her choice of guardian, worry for Lellie, and reluctance to leave my work at Dunlevy, Pace, and Trumble even for a few days.
It was hard to believe how much had changed with just a short time in tiny Majestic, Wyoming…
In a short time with Devon McKay.
And I began to realize that going back to Dallas now didn’t feel at all like I was going home.
EIGHTEEN
DEV
I felt raw and strange after telling Tully about Matt, but it had helped me process the guilt I still felt. For the first time since Matt’s death, I had the promise of a family again. I had someone depending on me. And I felt okay about it.
Maybe better than okay.
Lellie slept with her head against the side of the car seat. Kenji had returned to his seat after Tully had walked back to use the bathroom and let him know it was safe to return up front.
“She’s beautiful, Dev,” Kenji said with his usual calm voice.
Our trusty assistant rarely delved into personal commentary. He was the most professional person I knew and took pride in keeping our lives in order and his role clearly defined. While he wasn’t officially one of the brotherhood, he was an invaluable member of our group, and I wished he took more opportunities to own his place among us.
“Thank you. I agree.”
“You’re keeping her.”
Kenji had an uncanny way of knowing what was up before the rest of us did, so I wasn’t surprised he’d been able to figure out my change of plan.
“Yeah. I couldn’t stomach allowing someone else to raise her. She deserves to be loved and nurtured, valued and encouraged. I know I can give her that.” I smoothed back a wayward curl on her head. “And I’m lucky enough to already have the support of an incredible group of friends and family.”
He nodded. Glints of his ebony hair caught the sunlight slanting in from the window as he tilted his chin toward the back of the plane where Tully had gone. “He going to be able to give her up?”
I was confused by the question. “He doesn’t have a stake in this.”
Kenji pressed his lips together and nodded but didn’t speak.
I tried explaining. “He was never on the list of possible parents. Katie faced career challenges as a single mom, and she knew that no matter how much Tully cares about Lellie, making partner at his law firm is his priority.”
Kenji’s eyes narrowed so slightly that if I didn’t know him well, I wouldn’t have noticed.
“What?” I asked, throwing up my hands. “Jesus, just say it.”
“He loves her.”
There was no doubt about that. “Yes. Definitely. And he’s welcome to continue loving her. Visiting her. Keeping in touch with how she’s doing.” I looked back at Lellie.
Kenji’s only response was a thoughtful “Hmmm,” but it made me scowl in response.
“If you have a point to make, you’re going to have to give me more than a disapproving hum,” I said.
“I was just thinking about how priorities change, that’s all. And that it’s a good idea to give the people you care about options.”
I shook my head. “Still not getting it.”
Kenji studied me for another minute before retrieving his tablet, tapping on it a few times, and handing it to me.
I looked at an email app. “What is this?”
“The email account Katie and I set up when she found out she was pregnant.”
I stared at him. “What do you mean?”
“You asked me to coordinate any legal situations that might arise,” he reminded me. “So I got in touch with Katie to make sure she had my contact info. When she learned she was pregnant, she kept me in the loop. She knew you didn’t want to know… but she thought there might come a point you changed your mind. I kept in touch, checking in regularly and ensuring all was well. She sent these sweet updates, sharing ultrasound photos and anecdotes since we’d sort of become friends at that point. So I set up an email address where she could chronicle things for you in case you ever wanted to see them someday. This is everything she ever sent.”
There were at least a hundred emails here, if not more. “Kenji…” I whispered.
“There are photos and her birth story. I know that for sure. And then there are a few she marked for your eyes only, so I didn’t read them.”
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. The scope of it, the sheer number of messages and photos she’d sent, was overwhelming. Why in the world had she done this? I didn’t deserve it.
Kenji’s voice was soothing. “Katie wanted you to know you were Lellie’s father regardless of where you were in the world or how you felt about it. She wanted to make sure you didn’t miss it if you ever wanted to claim her.”