Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 102079 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 510(@200wpm)___ 408(@250wpm)___ 340(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 102079 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 510(@200wpm)___ 408(@250wpm)___ 340(@300wpm)
I giggled.
“Why are you asking me about this again?”
“Because I need real-life details in case Isaac brings it up again this summer.”
“This summer?”
I wrinkled my nose. “Yeah. I agreed to manage the Corys’ farm stand, and Isaac is working on the ranch, so I’m sure I’ll see him a lot.”
That should not have made me feel so giddy, but it did because Isaac had a guitar in his room, and he’d been in a band. The only thing I felt truly passionate about was music. I wanted to play a guitar and sing songs—I wanted to sing my songs. I had pages of lyrics in a notebook. And when I really let myself dream big, I imagined crowds of adoring fans singing those lyrics back to me.
“Sarah,” Heather said my name slowly. “You’re going steady with Matt. Everyone knows you’ll get married. Why are you planning sex talks with his brother? And why would he ask you if Matt’s thingy was wet?” She laughed.
The line clicked.
“Sarah, I need to call Erin,” Eve said, having picked up one of the other receivers in the house.
“Give me a minute,” I said.
“Fine,” Eve replied.
I waited for another click.
“Eve, I know you’re still on the line. Hang up.”
Click.
Heather laughed. “She’s probably still listening. I bet she just muted the phone. Eve? Are you listening? Sarah wants to know how wet a guy’s thingy is during sex.”
“Stop!” I giggled. “We don’t have any phones with mute buttons. She’s not on the line. I heard the click. And I never said I wanted to marry Matt. We’re eighteen. It’s a little early to make the assumption.”
“Tell that to your parents and his.”
I groaned. “I know. Mr. Cory has been really generous to our family.”
“Because he thinks you’re his future daughter-in-law.”
“That’s the problem. We can’t break up because my family is too indebted to his.” I sighed. “Our families are practically married. If we break up, it will affect everyone. But I’m not ready to get married. What if we’ve been together for the wrong reasons? We have forty-two people in our graduating class. What if we’re together for lack of a better choice or because our families have known each other forever and decided it’s in their best interest?”
“You could do a lot worse than Matt.”
I rubbed my forehead. “I’m aware. But it’s not about him. You know I want to go to Nashville. He’s going to be in Michigan. What if it’s just not our time?”
“Just wait until the end of summer. If you’re going to break up, do it when you’re not working for his family.”
I scraped my teeth along my bottom lip several times. “Break up sounds bad. I just want to go our separate ways. No big deal. Is that too much to ask?”
“I don’t know. You’ll have to ask Matt. Do you not love him anymore?”
“No. I mean … I love him. We love each other. But he loves baseball, and I love music. It doesn’t feel like our love is what matters most to either one of us right now.”
“What if the feeling is not mutual? Matt has loved you forever.”
“He doesn’t share my passion. I need someone who loves me enough to want to see me following my dreams, who supports me.”
“Like you sit in the bleachers and watch him play baseball even though you’re not a baseball fan.”
“Which he doesn’t know and ever will know,” I said with emphasis.
“My lips are sealed.”
“And don't tell Joanna or anyone that I'm having these thoughts about Matt, or else my parents will catch wind of it and ground me until I promise to marry him so we can breed little ranch helpers and missionaries.”
“That’s a little extreme.” Heather laughed.
“It’s not.”
“Well, I have to finish my trig homework while you dream of both Cory boys.”
“I am not dreaming of Isaac,” I said.
“Sarah, we’ve always dreamed about Isaac.”
I didn’t lie to Heather. Matt loved baseball the way I loved the lyrics to Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart.”
At eighteen, all we had was an abundance of aspiration. The only difference was everyone supported Matt’s passion as a brave and admirable pursuit of happiness through his God-given talent.
No one cared that, if given the chance, I could make hearts bleed as much as Bonnie Tyler.
“Go Matt!” I yelled, flying to my feet when he hit a double his first time up to bat.
As I sat on the bleachers with Heather and Joanna, Violet and Isaac made their way toward me.
“We’re late,” Violet said, sliding on her sunglasses. “I thought I was going to get Wesley to come, but no such luck.”
She hugged me before taking a seat behind us. “Oh, Isaac, there’s bird poop.” She pointed to the bench next to her.
“We’ll scoot down,” Heather offered while she and Joanna made me scooch to the left.