Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 79308 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 397(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79308 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 397(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
I sat down beside him. “It’s normal to feel left out. I don’t think that means you should start taking boyfriend applications.”
“I drank too much,” he changed the subject again.
“Yes, I’d say you did.”
“Way too many calories. I’m going to have to work out extra hard now.”
I frowned. “I was thinking more about how drunk you are.” Jesus. He was worried about calories when he felt like this?
“I talk a lot when I’m drunk. I’m gonna be annoyed I said all this to you.” He opened one eye, the other squinting while he looked my way. “Someone online called me shallow, and someone else said I’m getting fat.”
“Fuck them. Is there something wrong with being fat?”
This time, both his eyes widened. “No. My thoughts are just broken.” He gave me another goofy smile that didn’t match the mood or situation. “I almost went home with a guy to have sex just because I wanted someone to hold me. It makes me feel safe and wanted. How fucked up is that?”
Who was this man? He was saying so many unexpected things today. I felt like I was on a merry-go-round, my thoughts spinning, getting more and more confusing.
“Corbin…don’t have sex with people just to feel loved. You deserve better.”
“I don’t. I love sex. I do, but today I’m weird. And I’m a cuddle slut. I didn’t realize it until Elliott told me. I just like to be close to people. Sometimes Marcus would cuddle with me when he knew I needed it, or I’d lie with my head in his lap and he would run his fingers through my hair. He would still do it, but I feel like an asshole because of Kai…and then like a loser for putting my friend in that situation. I hate drunk mouth. I need to stop, but I can’t.”
Because he clearly needed to get all this out. Had Corbin ever shared these things with anyone? And why had he chosen me? Someone who hadn’t always been very nice to him. “Are you in love with Marcus?”
“No. People think that, but I’m not. It’s hard to put into words, especially when I drank my weight in alcohol. I think some things just are, and that’s us. He can give me things others can’t.” He was quiet for a moment, and I was trying to come up with a reply, when he said, “So…do you have a bathroom because I think I’m gonna be sick.”
“Oh shit.” I shoved to my feet, grabbing Corbin’s hand and tugging him with me. A loud, giddy laughter fell from his lips as he tripped along with me. “It’s not funny,” I told him, but it kind of was.
I didn’t know what made me do it, but I passed the bathroom in the hallway and led him to the one in my bedroom. I guess because it was bigger and more comfortable? The second we got inside the room, Corbin said, “Hey…your apartment is set up almost exactly like mine!” before rushing to the toilet, falling to his knees, and emptying his stomach.
I should have left. The smell wasn’t great, but something I didn’t understand wouldn’t let me walk away. I didn’t want Corbin to feel alone. I didn’t want him to be alone. So instead of giving him privacy, I knelt beside him, rubbing his back while he vomited.
“What are you doing?” he asked while flushing.
“I don’t know.” Because I didn’t, and honestly, it was easier not to think about it. The second round of upchucking gave me an excuse not to dwell on that and concentrate instead on massaging his back.
I didn’t realize it was possible for someone to vomit as much as Corbin did, and I couldn’t lie, it was gross, but I stayed with him. When he flushed a third time, I stood up, got a washcloth, and wet it before handing it to him.
“Well…this is embarrassing.” Corbin took it and wiped his mouth. “I should go home.”
“No,” I replied, and the shock in his eyes reflected the same feeling inside me. If Corbin had wanted to be alone, he wouldn’t have come here. We might have a complicated relationship, but I wasn’t an asshole. I didn’t want him to hurt, and it was obvious that Corbin was hurting, that maybe he hurt a lot.
Corbin sighed, leaning against the tub, legs bent and feet flat on the floor. His dark hair was messy, probably from sweat and running his fingers through it. It was the worst time, but I couldn’t help noticing his strong jaw and full lips.
“I’m sorry I ruined your evening, Spencer.”
“You didn’t ruin my evening,” I replied honestly. He’d shown me a different side to him tonight.
“Oh, so you were looking forward to watching a thirtysomething-year-old man puke his guts out like a drunk frat boy?”