Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 97287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 486(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97287 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 486(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
“What’s wrong?” he asks with a pause. “Are you crying?”
My heart pounds away in my chest.
“I’m just feeling emotional,” I manage to say. “It’s nothing.”
“Is it your grandma?” he asks, knowing that she’s been going downhill lately.
I went to visit her last month, and it was the hardest trip I’ve ever had to make. She seemed like my beloved bestemor in nearly every way, but every now and then she would get this blank look on her face. She wasn’t scared by it, she just wasn’t…there. And when she came back, it was like it took her a moment to know who I was. My cousin Peter was there, and he told me that it seemed like she was hard of hearing and needed a new aid, but I don’t think that’s it. She can hear fine…I just don’t know if she realizes who she’s listening to.
Oh god, why is life so fucking hard?
I close my eyes and try to breathe.
“I’m fine,” I tell him, not about to get into all the reasons. “I just need you to make me feel better.”
“I can do that,” he says softly.
He kisses me again, and I let myself sink into him, like I’m letting him carry everything inside, stuff I don’t want to carry anymore. I can feel the warmth of his body, the strength of his arms as he holds me. Everything seems to fade away, and for a little while I’m just content to be in his arms.
Eventually, his hands start to wander and I can feel a little bit of the tension start to ebb away.
“Make me feel something,” I whisper, feeling like I need him to touch me, to make me feel something other than this weight in my chest.
He moves over me, and I can feel his hardness against my thigh. I reach for him, but he pulls back, teasing me.
“Patience,” he whispers, and kisses me again.
He starts to explore my body with his mouth, kissing and licking and nibbling his way down. I arch my back and moan as he reaches my most sensitive spots. My body is a map, and he’s tracing and retracing his steps until every path feels like the right one. He takes his time, teasing me, until I’m gasping for air and begging for more. Finally, he slides inside me and I’m lost to him. I don’t know what’s going on in the world outside this room, but I don’t care. Right now, I’m only focused on him, on us.
He moves slowly at first, but then he starts to pick up the pace. I can feel him getting harder, and I match his thrusts, wanting more, needing more.
“Harder,” I manage to say, and he obliges, increasing his speed.
“Laila,” he groans, and I can feel his muscles tense, like he’s fighting off that edge.
I’m so focused on him that I don’t realize I’m getting close to the edge myself. I feel my heartbeat start to race, my gasps come quicker, and I know he’s almost there. I can feel it just from the sound of his breath and the way he moves. The pressure in my body is coiling, and I try to push it off for even just a few more seconds. I’m so close.
I moan his name, begging him to let me go.
He gives me one final thrust, and I shatter. I can feel the shudders spreading through my body, and I can’t hold it in. I cry out softly, doing all I can to stay quiet.
“James!” I say through a rough gasp.
The orgasm pulses through my body and my back arches in ecstasy, feeling so overwhelmed and delirious that I forget where I am for a moment.
Then I hear his breath catch in his throat, the way his body stiffens, the muscles in his neck corded, and I know he’s going over the edge.
“Oh, bloody hell, love,” he manages to say. “Bloody hell.”
We’re breathing heavily, and I’m still feeling the aftershocks of our orgasms when he rolls off of me. I roll toward him, using his shoulder as a pillow as I try to catch my breath. He wraps an arm around my body, and we are still for a long moment, trying to calm down. James’s ragged breathing is the only sound for a moment as we lie there; the click of the radiator turning on is the only interruption in the silence.
I’m still tingling, still feeling the aftershocks, but now my feelings are crashing over me like a tsunami. My heart is pressing against my rib cage, like it’s trying to break free. If I let it loose, I hope it makes a run for it, but I know it won’t. I know it thinks it belongs here, with James.
I can feel the tears starting to well up in my eyes, but I keep my face buried in his chest so he can’t see. He still has his arm around me, and he gives me a little squeeze.