Total pages in book: 166
Estimated words: 157273 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 157273 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
Every muscle in my body tensed, but I kept quiet.
“She held something to my head to help stop the bleeding, then told me to hold on because help was coming.” She spoke with complete and utter certainty. “She told me that she loved me, and to follow my heart, and to take care of what she’d left behind, and then she put her ring in the pocket of my skirt.”
Fuck. My soul left my body. Lina had said at least two of those things at the cove when I’d walked Allie back to her car.
“But then she told me I’d be okay, and she went back to the car for something, and I couldn’t stop her. I tried, but I couldn’t move. God, my mom just kept crying that I’d saved myself and left her there to die . . .” She shook her head violently. “I couldn’t tell her the truth was so much worse, that I couldn’t get her to stay.”
“Allie, it wasn’t your fault. That’s not what happened.” I shook my head.
“It is!” She lifted her right hand and the ring flashed in the sun. “See?”
“Holy shit, you have it.” Breathing took more than a little thought.
“Why did she go back?” She stepped backward. “You were there, Hudson. Why?”
“She never went back. She never left the car.” I took the steps that separated us and clasped her shoulders so she didn’t stumble off the pier. “And you didn’t leave her to die, Allie. I did.” And there it was.
She startled.
“I left her.” I’d only ever said those words to one other person.
“I don’t understand.” Her forehead crinkled. “She pulled me out—”
“No, love. I pulled you out,” I said slowly, so there was no chance of misunderstanding.
Her face slackened.
“When I got there, the car was already on fire. It took all my strength to rip open your door. The frame had been bent in the crash. Lina was conscious, and you were dazed. She told me to get you out, to save you, and I didn’t argue. I didn’t even hesitate.” I cradled the side of her face for what I feared might be the last time. “You were . . . God, Allie, you were essential to existence. Of course I was going to save you.”
“You?” she whispered, studying my eyes.
“Me.” I nodded. “I cut through your seat belt with my pocketknife, somehow got you out of the wreckage, and carried you up the embankment.” Even now, I could feel the heat of the fire on my back, the slight weight of her in my arms. I saw her eyes, watching me with absolute trust even as they unfocused and she started to slip into unconsciousness. My heart pounded like we were still there, on the side of the road I avoided to this day. “I was going to run straight back, but your head was bleeding so fucking fast. The wound was pulsing, and all I could think was it had to be arterial, and I was terrified you’d bleed out before anyone could find us. You were my world. Nothing mattered beyond you.” Even Lina. “I sat you down, took off my sweatshirt, and put pressure on the wound.”
“You.” This time it wasn’t a question.
“I told you to hold it there, and then turned around to go back for Lina . . .” My throat closed, and I had to take a deep breath and swallow so I could finish confessing. “But the fire had reached the gas tank and the car exploded.”
“Oh my God.” Her face crumpled, and her eyes watered.
“Listen to me, Allie.” I leaned in. “You didn’t leave her or let her do anything. None of it was your fault. Whatever you remember is just your mind trying to protect you, piecing together bits and pieces of what she said to you at the cove to give you one last memory of her. I’m the one who made the choice, and I chose you.”
“But I have the ring,” she whispered.
“I gave you the ring at the beach.” God, if I’d only known that’s how she remembered everything, I would have said something years ago.
“No.” She wrenched out of my hands and sidestepped before turning her back on me and walking toward shore.
“Lina gave me the ring before the Classic!” I followed her, pausing when she did to give her space. “You can ask Anne. She saw us in a hallway and thought we were sneaking around behind your back or something. But Lina told me to give you the ring.”
Allie pivoted to face me. “Why would she do that? It was her heirloom.”
“Because . . .” Now I was the one who needed a second, and Allie watched as I struggled for the words. “Because I was in love with you.” How, out of everything, was that the hardest truth to tell? “And Lina, she saw what I thought I kept pretty well hidden.”